A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:About 5 years ago I fell in love with this girl. We had the most amazing conversations. We had great chemistry. We were pratically the same despite being opposite. ( She's latin, preppy, and a dancer. I'm jewish, a metal head and a artist.)And after working up so much courage to ask her out, in hoping that someday she could be the love of my life, I find out that all that time she had a boyfriend, and now she just got married to the same guy.I was hurt emotionally.I feel that what was the point of getting to know someone like that and ending up hurt by it. It's like there was no reason. I feel like I'm incapable of finding true love if I keep thinking about this girl because I'll always be comparing to how great she was.I feel like I'll become incapable of loving because I was hurt so bad that I don't want to be hurt again, so I'll never try to meet someone.And now it's like history is just doomed to repeat itself because I met a girl recently who is similar to her (different upbringing and job). I'm in the process of getting to know her but I feel that heartbreak is just on the horizon.So I feel why risk it? Is there any hope for me? Have I lost myself in this thing called heartbreak
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female
reader, kirra07  +, writes (28 August 2010):
Don't give up hope. Heartbreak hurts. And chances are you're going to face it again. So far I've probably had my heart broken at least 4-5 times? Relationships are hard. Breaking up is hard. Not getting the one you care about is hard. I know it's a depressing thought, all this potential future heartbreak. But the hope is finding someone to share some good times with and possibly make a future. The pain will fade in time. Especially if you make the effort to put yourself out there again and live life, which it seems like you're trying to do. You're not doomed. Everyone, and I mean just about EVERYONE, gets hurt sometime. Just dust yourself off and keep meeting people. It's scary to risk heartbreak, but you have to risk putting yourself out there to feel that amazing feeling of being in love and connecting with someone.
A
female
reader, dijoyful  +, writes (28 August 2010):
 This girl is now married and started a new life for her self, you have to let her go, wish her well, even in your mind and grasp the future for yourself. Im gald you have met someone new, this is the first step to moving on. You mustn't let this one bad experience mar your furture relationships, all our experiences in life are what makes us grow and learn, there is no reason that history will repeat its self, if you stay possitive and open. This is a completely differant person,yes you might be attracted to them because they remind you of you ex, just remember their not. Be the best you can be.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (28 August 2010):
 Heartbreak is a twisting crossroad full of maps. You know where you are but you are lost all the same.
Know that there was a point. Everything has a purpose, every object, event, person, whatever. Everything has it's purpose. I was in a similar situation. I fell in love, I got my heartbroken and was on the verge of suicide. Fast forward single year and I'm ten times better, stronger, smarter than the person I was a year ago, because of that heartbreak.
History is NOT doomed to repeat itself unless you allow it to. But you don't regret meeting her do you? You enjoyed the conversations you had, what you thought was a bond between you two. Forget what happened in the end and admit that in the beginning and the middle of this story, you were happy.
You will find another woman to love you, another woman that you will love. You won't bother comparing her because you will already know that she's more lovely than anything you've ever seen. So go and meet people. Out there, the love of your life is waiting for you to meet her.
Time heals all.
I hope that helps.
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