A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:How would men in their late 40s feel if a girl in her mid 20s had feelings and a few x-rated thoughts about them? Would they be repulsed or find it a joke, or be interested in her?Yes I do like a man a bit older and I'm so scared to hell him incase of above. I am mature for my age, I have a steady job and 2kids. So I'm not the average 20 year old parting all the time. No disrespect but I hope you get what I mean. I am told I am attractive looking even though I'm a UK size 14. I keep myself nice but I have had 2 kids. He is in his late 40s one if the kindness men I have met, aleays helpes me when I need it. I guess I would be lost if this freeken him out because I need his help alot! All i want to know for a mans point of view if a girl my age told you she found you handsome and very attractive, would you be interested or would it Greek you out. How would you respond? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Serpico  +, writes (26 July 2016):
Im 48, but a very young looking 48. I have women in their late 20s come on to me all the time. No big deal.
A
female
reader, Flower89  +, writes (24 July 2016):
 So he gives you money and you provide him with sex? Come on sweetie wake up.This man knows what he is doing. Why doesn't he bring a female friend or colleague when he visits or brings you things? Single young mum of two kids living alone and a older man is buying her gifts and visiting her alone!Of course he wants you!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2016): Please don't feel offended by this but, you don't need to sleep with him to prove you are grateful.
Do you want your son or daughter learning that?
You have said you, "need his help" so you want his "kindness" to continue, you already are dependent on him.
In my view it seems like he is more of a father figure. Do you see your own Dad?
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2016): I posted this question.I met him through his work as I am a client. Started out as a client but now he helpes me with anything i ask, repairs around my house. There was one time I eas low on cash and he walked past when I crying about how I am going to get the kids through the next week. He went off and came back an hour later with a food shop and a toy each forthe kids. I offered 2x to pay him back but he rejected that. That is why i said he is the most kind man I have met. He phones me and visits a lot to check I'm ok. As he knows I don't have any family to support me. I have other friends but none with kids or settled down yet so don't see them often. You can see why it is very hard not to fall for a man who provides me with things I have never had, support, help, advice. He has done more for me and the kids than their real father has. One is 4 and the other is 2. Their father hasn't contacted them in 2 years.
...............................
A
female
reader, miss frank +, writes (23 July 2016):
I wonder, is there any signs he likes you? How do you know him? How has he come to help you out so much? These maybe indicaters of how he may feel- needing more info
...............................
A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (23 July 2016):
 Being a UK size 14 does not mean you're less attractive, so don't "even though I'm a size 14" when talking about being attractive. No size means automatically unnattractive, therefore being a size 14 isn't a downside. Also, saying "I keep myself nice but have had 2 kids" implies that the body you have because of birth is negative, when it's actually remarkable.Suggesting you're not a 20 year old who parties all of the time, making you mature for your age, is a bit irrelevant because you're not 20. You're probably at a very average place in your life for someone your age :)I think you need to be realistic; he's not "a bit" older, he's a lot older. That may be fine, but often that gap is too big for compatibility, particularly in life stages.What sort of help does he give you? What does he get out of it, if anything?Is he single? If so, has he been married before or had a very long-term partner? If not, that could be a bit of a red flag.How much input does the father(s) of your children have? How old are your children?Does this guy seem interested in you?I'm asking so many questions because it's important that you have some kind of hint that he feels the same, or you could get turned down.I wouldn't tell him you find him attractive; it'll be implied if you ask him on a date, so ask him out for coffee when you next see him :)
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2016): No he would certainly not be repulsed.
A young attractive girl tells him she wants him?
He will think he is dreaming!
However if you are looking for a relationship, I don't think that would be what he would want.
If you are looking to act out they X-rated thoughts he would definitely be up for that.
I'm sure he has his own about you, and has an idea. Why is he going out his way for you?
...............................
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (23 July 2016):
 No he won't freak out. A late 40s guy hit on by an attractive 20something lady ?... At most, he will pinch himself to make sure he is not dreaming, and wonder if Xmas came early this year.
But, it depends what you want from him. If you have in mind anything marginally more serious than a couple of rolls in the hay, no, as Honeypie said, do not bring up your X- rated thoughts as your opening move. That gives a precise, sexual slant to the situation, and , unless this is exactly what you want, although I doubt he would turn down an offer of sex ( or , what he will interpret as such ) - not necessarily sex= relationship or sex = dates .
For instance, as I think you may have noticed, many men do not particularly desire getting involved with a single mother of 2 ( I am not saying this is right, I am saying this just IS ) - and that could be an obstacle to further developments , much more than your age difference.
So, if you have in mind to get to know him better, see if you could get along etc.etc.- no x rated hints and just ask him out for coffee and take it from there.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (23 July 2016):
 Is he single?
If he is then I would NOT start out by revealing that you have x-rated thoughts of him. I'd just ask him out for lunch/coffee and see where it goes. IF it them develop into more THEN you can tell him.
If he IS not single then just move on to a guy who is.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2016): Well, let me put it this way. My brother who is in his mid 40's is always chasing women your age! LOLSure, guys like younger women. And they would be obviously flattered if a young woman finds them attractive. But the only thing you have to ask yourself here is are you compatible for a relationship long term? Do you have enough in common to sustain a relationship long term? Or would it just be sexual? Because let's face it, men would love to have sex with a younger woman in most cases. But do these same men actually want a committed relationship with a younger woman? That is a separate question. Some may but many may not. You need to beware of the men who see you as a toy, arm candy, an ego boost etc. So you will have to be sure of his character too. Hopefully you have known him for awhile and trust him. And know for sure he is single and not married.So, ask yourself if you feel you have enough to talk about with him. Are you on the same page intellectually, emotionally, goal wise etc? When you spend time together, do you feel like his equal? Or do you find that maybe you are needing someone to take care of you, like a father figure and you are affectionate about him because he helps you out a lot? So, it's that kind of a relationship. Where you might be a little vulnerable because you are a single parent and like to have a man around helping you. So you have attached to him. Just some thoughts. So, do you really like him or are you liking the idea of having a father figure who provides you with some stability in your life? And some much needed support? And perhaps you are a little lonely?Just be careful with your feelings. I am not sure I would tell him outright. I would wait awhile and see how the relationship progresses. He will pursue you if he is interested. That is what men do. So, sure you can be friendly. Throw out hints if you will. But let him be the one to initiate. You do not want to be used. You do not want him to take advantage of you and then feel worse. If you really like him and it's more than a sexual interest, then take it slow. Because if you move too fast, he will probably take advantage of you sexually and then he might not want a relationship. And may not help you anymore. How would you feel about that? Just be careful.Don't rush in. Whatever is meant to happen will happen. Just let it unravel naturally and in due time. You have to be kind to yourself. Take care of yourself. You have two kids to think about. Don't mess yourself up with a guy. You need to be emotionally healthy for THEM.
...............................
|
