A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I have recently had my third child...and unfortunately my body will never be the same as it was before kids. I have worked out hard and lost all the excess pregnancy weight but still have scars and sags that my doctor says are 'just part of being a mom' My husband agrees that my body is less attractive to him and says its harder for him to become aroused with me even though he claims to love me dearly. Im depressed and miserable....knowing that no matter how much trouble I take to look after myself and be attractive he will never consider my body to be as beautiful as it was pre baby or as beautiful as the flawless women he drools over (even though he tries to hide it...I feel like giving up on myself and my marriage.....Im too embarrassed to talk to anyone except my Doctor who just says I need to accept that nearly every womans body changes in ways that cant be repaired after kids
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female
reader, dollparts +, writes (5 March 2007):
hunny! your beautiful! and I don't think your husband deserves you! (sorry to say that but its true) personally I think he should be really really greatful that you had those kids and not to mention that he has no clue what it feels like to be a female so he should shut his trap thats what you should say to him when he says something like that I think you should go out and shop and buy a nice out fit for your self to make your self or like cd said some sexy underwear trust me the little things like that help when your feeling down about your self and if you want in your free time go for a walk for about a half an hour the little things like that also help you feel better and it will tone it up a bit you know? just remember and I want you to look at your self in the miror and tell your self that your beautiful! I hope this helps =)xoxox
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2007): hi there,I think you are married to a wrong man then...sorry to be harsh. I am not saying physical appearance doesn't matter but at least he should give yourself some credit that you have lost your excess, you are trying to look attractive and you have given him 3 beautiful kids. There are much more important things in life than being critical about somebody's appearance. It's not just about you two anymore but it's 5 in the family now.If I was in your shoes I would try to get out of the house,buy myself some smart clothes,work or enroll myself to some new courses that will take your mind of these things a little otherwise you will be in the same rut everyday. Also, make new friends and let people recognise your true worth...he will come around when he see other men appreciating his women. Stay positive in whatever field you choose to take and let people know what you are made of (you are a real woman with real substance).Good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2007): Thanks but the doctor has told me that no cream will fix the stretch marks as they are the result of skin elastic fibres breaking which cannot be repaired no matter how much cream I use....the are very bad...I do all the other stuff and think Im about as fit as I can be but this doesnt change the fact that you can tell by looking at my body that I have had children and my husband would prefer that he could not tell
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A
female
reader, rammsteinfan +, writes (28 January 2007):
Eat healthy, exercise at least 3X a week, and drink plenty of water. Also there are creams and preparations on the market that make your stretch marks disappear! Check them out....there is one called Mederma for scars and stretch marks.
I hope that this will help!
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A
female
reader, AngelofLove +, writes (27 January 2007):
How far you are willing to go for a better figure is up to you but do it for yourself not just your husband.
Naturally, you can eat healthy: drink 8 glasses water per day, 5 veg/fruit day, no fried food, no bread, no coffee, no smoking, no alcool, no rich sauces, boiled or grilled food only, no sweets. Combined with daily exercise either running or swimming for at least 30 minutes.
If you have tried the above and there is still localized obesity you cannot get rid of, you could try liposuction. Do your research about it though, due to complications, finance and side effects.
Meanwhile, love yourself the way you are, stress makes weight loss more difficult. Try hipnotherapy, different methods work on different people.
Another good way to lose weight is to make love at least 3 times per week, it tones all your muscles. About 200 calories per session.
Good luck
Angel of Love x
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (27 January 2007):
Yep your doctor is right. You need to accept it and so does your husband. To be honest I find it awful that he would say to you that he finds you less attractive now after you've given him three beautiful children. Your doctor has told you that nothing can be done so try not to be down about it. I'm sure your kids think you're the most beautiful woman in the world! If you need a confidence booster why not buy yourself some sexy underwear? I'm sure that'll go a long way to making you both feel better.
CD
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