A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I recently broke up with my boyfriend (well he broke up with me) but I don't want the relationsihp to be over. I'm just curious how many people have experienced break-ups and gotten back together successfully?I know it happens - I've seen it in my own family. Just curious what people's insight into it are.THANKS!
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female
reader, supersquirrel  +, writes (16 August 2007):
 i also split up with my boyfriend recently (well, he split up with me) this time 'for good'. but in the 16ish months we've been together, we've split up and got back together more times than i can remember. and each time we promised we'd make it work, but it never did, the arguments just got worse with each time.this morning he made it clear to me that his mind was made up, and i made it clear to him that i wanted him back and that i wasn't willing to be just friends.a few hours later he rang me asking if i'd like to go to the cinema when i'm ready to be friends, then, a few hours after that, he came online to me, talking about how weird it was when we walked away from eachother earlier without kissing goodbye (after i went to return some stuff) so, i'm taking it that he may be unsure already?since telling him i want him back, i've realised that what i need to do and what i'm going to do is exactly what i'm going to tell you to do:go out and spoil yourself (i personally hope to be going on a spa evening soon), leave him be. if it's meant to be, you will get back together, but don't hang around and wait for him, get out there and have fun, meet new guys.if it's obvious that we are the ones who want the relationship back most, that puts them 'in charge', if you like, because they are the ones with the power to make that ultimate decision, so we should take ourselves out of that position, and leave it open to them, if they want to take it up.if or when he comes crawling back, make sure you really think about whether it's worth it; if he's ended it once, he may do it again.
A
female
reader, x...L...x +, writes (15 August 2007):
 Hmmm.. this is more tricky... ive known many people break up and get back together.. sometimes it works and other times it doesn't.. the main things i would think about is why you broke up.. arguing is a main problem in relationships and usually things wont change if you get back together as things are not the same.. not as special as they used to be.. if both are really willing to make it work i dont see why it cant but if theres only one imput i wouldnt recommend it..
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2007): My fiance and I broke up and got back together after a month not long after we first met. She had a deep issue of commitment and was not sure how to deal with it. In some ways the break helped us a lot, becaue we had the freedom to walk away, but we proved we loved each other too much to do so. We got back together and despite the ups and downs we havent given up, knowing we are in it for love and nothing else. Hope that helps =]
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (15 August 2007):
 I agree with the posters. Very often break-ups are forever.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2007): It happened once for me. But I didn't take him back because in my mind, if he left me once, he will do it againg. Either that or he doesn't care very much about me.
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A
female
reader, LauraE +, writes (15 August 2007):
Hi,
It only happens very rarely, so the best thing is to assume that it won’t happen for you. Often when people do try again, they split up again after a short time. Just get on with your life as if it is 100% over. It hurts, but it gets easier I promise.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2007): I think it is best to live your life like you are broken up forever.....get busy, meet and date other men and let him find you if and only if you still want him back at that time, set some boundaries with him and stick to them.
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A
female
reader, tchl +, writes (15 August 2007):
My partner broke up with me and it was the worst three mths of my life, however I started to move on and started to leave hima lone. But we only got back together when I stopped calling him and stopped going round. He started dating an ex-girlfriend and it only lasted a week as he soon came to his sense's and remember why they broke up in the first place and why I was a much better offer.It's now three yrs later and we have two amazing children. My advice is don't call him move on with your life for a bit and when the MUPPET see's that you have gotten on with your life he will wake up. The old saying you want something you can not have comes to mind.
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