A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:HiI would appreciate your advice as I’m in a difficult dilemma. There was this guy I dated in the past, he broke my heart and we left things on bad terms. I found it hard to move on and till this day I have thought about him. Three years later, he has recently added me to join this networking social site and I joined. He messaged me and said he thinks I’ll like it; it’s a way of meeting new people or to stay in touch with friends.Do I respond to this message? I do want to find closure as I have questions on how we left things on bad terms but I don’t think I can remain friends. My experience with him as affected my outlook on relationships. If I should reply, what shall I say?Thank you
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female
reader, kate28  +, writes (13 November 2011):
I would accept the invite, but not respond to the message. The message sounds like a canned message that was automatically sent out with the friend request. Accept the invite if you're curious and see what he does.
I had a similar situation with a guy. He did end up contacting me we had some communication, I realized he was a total jerk and was all of the sudden completely over him.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2011): Many times those social networking sites will send out canned emails to anyone on a member's email contact list. You may have been one of hundreds of people on his contact list that message went out to. I don't see why you would reply or that he would even expect a reply from you? There was no question in there, not even to see how you are doing these days.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (12 November 2011):
I would be extremely cautious over this. This guy broke your heart and it was all left on bad terms. To add to that, you've joined the legion of people who seem to want so called 'closure' - the pursuit of which has left many, many people utterly miserable because they search for something they can't have. You know yourself that you won't really remain friends, so this is really is just prolonging your own agony.
This guy broke your heart - that's really as much closure as you need. If I were you, I'd leave him in the past. If you focus on this man, you'll miss out on other things that will change your life.
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