A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:i just got over a guy I liked for two years, and found i liked a new guy who likes me back, i went on a group date with him as friends and we were planing another when my best friend told me she liked him too. This was of course after I agreed to a one-on-one date with the guy at a dance. She refused to speak to me for a couple days. We've been friends seven years, but whenever she likes a guy a couple days later she might like a new guy, she is that flighty. But she's refusing to not like this guy. When she did speak to me she avoided bringing up the guy and acted like nothing was wrong, but out of our friends she's dragging my other best friend into this. I don't want my other best friend to have to choose between us if things get bad. I still want to be friends with her, but I still like the guy. Please give me advice. One person I went to said don't let her guilt me into giving her the guy, the other said not to let him come between us. What should I do?
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female
reader, Neanthia +, writes (24 January 2010):
 Thanks for the answers, I'm the one who posted the question "A love triangle" but I wasn't sure I could trust the site then so I didn't register. The date was both disaster and kind of okay. Of course a ton of my friends had to show up at the exact same place the guy and I were. I kind of made a huge mistake though. My friend loved this one song she'd been talking about for a few days. I accidentally danced with the guy right in front of her to that song. I never heard the song before so I didn't realize what it was until it was too late I tried to track her down repeatedly and talk to her but she ran off and refused to look at me. The friend I had hoped to avoid involving in this was of course involved, despite my best efforts. She wasn't upset or anything she would spend time with the both of us and try and get my friend to talk to me until her date left out of frustration, then we were both bawling our eyes out in the girl's restroom. Me for being angry at myself. This was not the first time this happened. Nearly every guy I liked my friend liked as well, I guess that's what happens when your as close as sisters. My other friend because of her date.
I unfortunately have a very annoying cousin and she has an even more annoying bf, who kept pushing the guy and me into each other trying to get us to kiss. This made things even worse. I went to buy some Pepsi with one other friend. When we got back to the dance floor my friend stormed up to me and said, "He danced with me, but the whole time he was looking for you, now go have fun and dance with him!" Those weren't her exact words there was also a part about slapping me but I don't think its relevant here. I don't know what to do now, I can't be happy with the guy knowing my friend is miserable, and she and the guy won't be happy together cuz the guy told me he didn't see her in a romantic light. Now I'm not sure what to do, my friend won't speak to me, and if I have a chance I know what I'm gonna tell her and that's that the guy's not worth it, she is my best friend and like my sister, no she IS my sister, I don't want to lose her, but I still want the guy to be my friend even if its not as my bf, fellas how to I explain that to him?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2010): I think your friend needs a bit of a reality check. Just because she likes the guy doesn't stop you from seeing him. If he liked her then he would of asked her out, but its you who was going to go out with him.
It can be really difficult at school but if she is such a good friend she will see that this guy likes you and should be pleased for you that he wants to go out.
Don't let a boy ruin a friendship because boys do come and go and friends should stay together through anything, but if she can't accept that she can't get what she wants then perhaps she isn't such a great mate.
Take Care and I hope everything works out ok for all of you.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (22 January 2010):
If she had said that she had liked him BEFORE you had gone out with him, then I'd have said back off. As it is, you are already dating, and now she has admitted she likes him. Sounds to me like she's jealous to be honest. But she's too late. She knew you liked him, and for her to say that now and then ignore you is a sign that she's not all that great a friend. Stick with the guy. If your friend wants to be immature about it, fine. Let her.
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