A
female
age
36-40,
*weeite
writes:hi, I have been going out with my boyfriend for 6 years. Recently he has found out that I cheated on him twice, and feels he can not forgive me, he now thinks that I never loved him at all and that it was all a lie but it was not. I love this boy so much and want him back in my life. What should I do please help? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, sweeite +, writes (15 July 2007):
sweeite is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthe last person that answered my question thank you ever so much i would like to keep in touch with you as a friend is that ok
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2007): I can understand why you cheated. You're uniquely human. There are many styles of relationships that will work with your desire to have more than one sexual partner. Trying to shoe-horn everyone into the same relationship style is a big part of our homogenized society's relationship woes.
You need to come to terms with the fact that you may never fit into the one-woman-one-man relationship and give yourself time to get over the understanding of that. For the sake of yourself and future partners - a "designer relationship" might be the best way to go. One person claimed you to be an addict. I don't agree.
Secondly but most importantly, don't lie. Cheating isn't cheating if your life partner is cool about it and you may have even made it through this one OK had you been honest and you told him right away about your infidelities. You may have even had the chance of turning this last relationship into something that would work for both of you. It's the lying that will kill, not just relationships, but everything.
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A
female
reader, sweeite +, writes (14 July 2007):
sweeite is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you all for your comments. they have all help me see it better. xxxxx much love
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A
male
reader, Dunregi  +, writes (12 July 2007):
Girl, you should wake up. If you love someone the least thing that will come into your mind is hurting him. Mistake is to human and temptations are always there, but you should never allow yourself to be intimidated by these words. Cheating on your partner to more than once results into addiction which later give birth to a chain of love affairs (love triangle). Take your time to search your soul and know what you really want, otherwise if you don't get to know yourself and express it, your man will never forgive you. There is nothing as painful as knowing your loved one sleeps around with men. Take care and be happy and satisfied with what you have.
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A
male
reader, leonard j.Douglas  +, writes (12 July 2007):
Hey! I could forgive you for cheating on me, that would be the easy part of a relationship However there is such a thing as trust. And that is something I would never again be able to find within a renewed relationship. You played with relationship-fire, and you got burned. And only a fool would rush forward to quench the fire of a twotiming bf or gf.
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A
female
reader, love-him +, writes (12 July 2007):
 Hi babe,
Why did you cheat. Ok, you cheated once, that could be let off, but twice? Im sorry but i honestly think you need to get over this lad. I dont think he will come back to you..
Im sorry..
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A
male
reader, ombiance  +, writes (12 July 2007):
girls like you confuse me, if you love him than why cheat in the first place? all trust is gone, hell never look at you in the same way again. you wont feel the same, in his eyes you will appear extreamly different. now if he does happen to take you back for some strange reason the next year or more will be all questioning. where did you go? who did you go with? who was that on the phone? the question is can you put up with that and open yourself to it as in give him undeniable access to your phone and email. because that is what it will take to get trust back
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A
female
reader, TaylorChu  +, writes (12 July 2007):
 You cheated. You broke his trust and he is extremely hurt. If he feels he can't forgive you and that your love was being given to other guys...thats a knife in the heart, love. One of the only ways for someone to take back a cheater back is if they love them and believe them which means they have given back an ounce of trust. You are going to have to show him that you can be trusted again and that means being honest with everything you do. If he isn't willing to take you back then you need to pack your bags and leave because you smashed his heart and you only had once chance with that.
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