No sex in 5 years
Q. My wife and i havent had sex in five years, i would like to try and get her excited enough to have a go, how should i approche the issue and will it hurt her after so long, iam willing to try anything....
A. 18 July 2022: Well, first off, do you know WHY you aren't having sex anymore? And why it's been 5 years?
What happened 5 years ago?
Maybe that is a starting point.
Also, why would it hurt HER to tell her you miss intimacy with her?... (read in full...)
Dont know if marriage can be saved
Q. I am feeling so angry and hurt. I love my husband, as to why I still do, I really don't know. I want my children to have a household with both parents present. But is sacrificing my happiness worth it? In my marriage there have been happy times...
A. 15 July 2022: Well, first of all, let's start with the obvious.
You are BOTH drinking around the kids? And then arguing?
Seems like you didn't FORGIVE him. You two just stuck that "babymomma and baby" under the rug.
Forgiveness means that you do NOT ho... (read in full...)
Friends come first
Q. I shall try and keep this as short as possible, but my boyfriend does not spend any time with me. However, he will happily make time for his friends. We have been dating for a few years now and like many relationships, we had our honeymoon pha...
A. 15 July 2022: OK, OP
What EFFORT does he put into the relationship? Any at all?
He goes out of his way to go hiking with his dad so YOU can dog-sit? While working from home?
He doesn't want to cuddle on the couch for a movie anymore.
He doesn't w... (read in full...)
Want a little bit more of her. I'm 14, She is 13.
Q. So, Lets start this simple. I am 14. She is 13. We have known each other for a while now. So Far we have just kissed, But I would love to get under her shirt. I am unsure if I should do this just yet. But I really want to... Please help...
A. 10 July 2022: Keep your mitts to yourself, OP
She is ONLY 13. I know a year doesn't seem like much but you need to not PUSH your WANTS unto her. Or make her feel she HAS to DO things she doesn't really feel ready for.
If you REALLLLLLLY care for her, slow do... (read in full...)
Thank you for dear cupid
Q. Hi all, Today is my birthday and I am happy to be in a new lovely country working at a dream come true organisation. I would also like to celebrate with all the wonderful people who make it a success, including this wonderful platform of advi...
A. 10 July 2022: Congratulations! I hope your life keeps getting better!
... (read in full...)
I am not sure if I am ready to see him
Q. Dear Cupid, I'm dating this boy Christian Bristol and we've been dating for almost 7 months and he's been telling me that he'll see me after he's done getting his truck fixed and he's also told me that he can't wait to see me. I don't know if I'...
A. 10 July 2022: If you are not sure if you are ready to see him yet, tell him.
Also, if he is coming to visit he doesn't plan on staying WITH you, does he? If so, I'd alter those plans too. Because what If you two don't click at all?
And remember HE is s... (read in full...)
My boyfriend still speaks to his ex
Q. Background context; my boyfriend has told me he still occasionally speaks to his ex girlfriend via social media. They broke up nearly 3 years ago, mostly due to the distance (she’s Canadian, he lives in the UK). Although it was quite a volatile ...
A. 10 July 2022: Here is the thing, OP
You wouldn't keep talking to exes because YOU feel that is inappropriate in a new relationship. HE isn't you. He obviously doesn't feel the same way about this.
So, what does that mean?
It means that on ONE level you tw... (read in full...)
Should I report my friend?
Q. I'm in a quandary and would appreciate advice. For over two decades I've been friends with someone that I can no longer be friends with. The friend continually interrupts me and very often talks down to me, making me feel not good enough. ...
A. 10 July 2022: "Do I simply walk away from the whole thing and try to forget about her?"
I would.
It's going to be hard for YOU to prove she doesn't live with her dad and I doubt the Government has the time and people to look into whether or not she committe... (read in full...)
What do I do with ridiculously cute new straight friend?
Q. I am an openly gay 17m and I am very lucky to go to a school where there is a lot of acceptance and encouragement and I feel surrounded by allies. I was surprised especially how some of the notorious jocks and aggressively straight guys handled it. ...
A. 8 July 2022: "I cannot tell what is going on in David’s cute little head. Is he gay or bi and just not ready to admit it? "
No, he told you, HE is straight or perhaps rather he WANTS to be straight. He is 14. A child, OP. His "sexuality" is not up for debate. ... (read in full...)
Should I ask new BF to let me measure his manhood?
Q. There is a thing in my friend group right now where the girls are comparing their boyfriend’s size like a dare where everyone is supposed to personally measure it while their guy is having an erection. They have gotten very detailed with the rules ...
A. 8 July 2022:
EVERY man out there worries about not being big enough, thick enough, or whatever standard PORN tells them their penis should be, do you really think they want their GF to measure them so they can TELL all their friends?
Are you serious? Did... (read in full...)
Does he want a girlfriend or a babysitter
Q. Dear cupids, I started hanging out with this guy I met in college a year ago off and on. I was just getting out of relationship and although we discussed being exclusive briefly ;I never took things seriously. One thing led to another and we s...
A. 8 July 2022: I'm not sure if he just wants a babysitter or an instant family. It IS convenient for him to have YOU spend the night there when he works. As it saves HIM money and he knows his son is with someone he trusts.
"He really wants me to be a mother f... (read in full...)
My mistress is now my life partner but she is always worried I will cheat on her. How can I get her to finally trust me?
Q. I am going to need some help here. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost 10 years. I met her as a married man, which is when we got involved. We both know having an affair was wrong so I won’t need critiquing on our past mistakes. We ...
A. 8 July 2022: Easy answer, OP
You can't.
It's really that simple.
She knows you were willing to cheat on someone you had married, so why not cheat on her too when you get bored or "insert whatever reason"?
Does it mean that you WILL cheat? No. Nothing... (read in full...)
Talking about sex in a way that wont cause anxiety
Q. Hi! My question is basically this: How do I talk with my husband about sex without hurting his feelings? We’ve been together for 17 years (we are 45 now). At the beginning, as is always the case, things were fine. OK, I’ll be honest, when I s...
A. 3 July 2022: Could be he needs to see a doctor. Not being able to keep an erection can be a sign of illness.
Or he is JUST not all that interested in sex and never really was?
I get that he is anxious and overthink things (sounds like a version of OCD) ... (read in full...)
Friend came onto me I rejected now hes making things uncomfortable
Q. I want to know what to do .. I used to run a support group for families with disabled children from my sons school but although this stop 2 yrs ago . I am still very involved in helping or even being friends with some of the families.. me and my h...
A. 3 July 2022: I'd tell him if he doesn't stop YOU will have to exclude HIM from the group. His wife and their child will still be welcome.
To be very frank, OP - I think you need to call the wife and ask her to no longer bring her husband as you feel uncomfor... (read in full...)
Is just an excuse?
Q. I get on with most people but this is the first time that has ever happened to me. I’ve been friends with a female for two years, who I know in life. we have never fallen out and she respects me. this is where things get weird, I messaged susie for ...
A. 2 July 2022: "should I just tell her where to go?"
You call her a friend? A friend would WANT to hear from you. Would want to reach out to you too and keep in touch.
Personally? I would consider her an EX-friend. Block her, Unfriend her, And remove your... (read in full...)
Troubled work situation
Q. Hi guys, I work part-time in a firm. My job and my hours make it difficult for me to get to know my colleagues (I have tried!). I come, do my hours, and then leave. That’s just how my job is. The only people I know are the guys at the reception...
A. 2 July 2022: Go directly to the Director. Figure out from the "horse's mouth" what is up with your job and hours. I would honestly have gone there as soon as you were told you had your hours cut and that the Director was "responsible" for this "mix-up". Just ... (read in full...)
I gave him my number now worried things will get weird
Q. Hi, I did a very stupid thing. I gave my number to someone I'm not interested in, I'm going to this gym and a new person came and started talking to me. I make it a habit to talk to people because I'm trying to socialize more and all that. He was...
A. 1 July 2022: EDIT!
"Should you lie to him? no. You (should) have to "hide" behind a fictitious BF to avoid talking to someone. It's not your job to "not hurt a guy's feelings". "
Should OF COURSE have been:
Should you lie to him? no. You (shouldn't) have... (read in full...)
Am I I imaginging it?
Q. I met this guy a few months ago and I'm so crazy in love with him. I thought it was a crush and that it would disappear after some time but it didn't. He has a lovely personality and he dances really nicely. The thing is, we haven't talked much so ...
A. 1 July 2022: "The thing is, we haven't talked much so I'm not sure if he likes me or not. "
So it's NOT love you feel.
It's attraction, infatuation, lust, curiosity, and, interest. In short, you have a crush.
TALK to him, get to know him. You will quick... (read in full...)
Give him a chance?
Q. Hi all. I met a guy on Facebook. We've been talking for about three months. He seems like a decent, respectful person. When I saw his profile picture, I was attracted to him. He looks so handsome. Yesterday, while speaking he requested a pict...
A. 30 June 2022: I'd say no.
If he gives you creeped-out vibes (mostly due to how he looks similar to the dodgy pervy tutor) there is probably something else you have picked up on that you are unsure of.
Or if you are really unsure, HAVE a video call/facet... (read in full...)
I gave him my number now worried things will get weird
Q. Hi, I did a very stupid thing. I gave my number to someone I'm not interested in, I'm going to this gym and a new person came and started talking to me. I make it a habit to talk to people because I'm trying to socialize more and all that. He was...
A. 30 June 2022: "I do have an inability to say no."
Time to practice!
If you can tell him no thanks to going to certain classes, you CAN tell a guy no to giving out your number.
I had to teach my daughters that it's PERFECTLY OK to not give out your number... (read in full...)
Boyfriend doesn't think I am any fun
Q. My partner and I ended up getting in a fight last night. We were at a baseball game and he was drinking and wanted to rent one of those standing scooters to take home all of a sudden. I’d never done this before and wasn’t comfortable but he kept ...
A. 30 June 2022: He is manipulating you, picking at YOUR insecurities of feeling that you aren't "good enough" for him.
You think that when he says you are lame, then you HAVE to do whatever he wants, in order to NOT be "lame". And what happened? YOU got hurt!
... (read in full...)
How do I get over the guilt? I want out of my marriage
Q. Hi everyone, I have been married for 8 years and after a long and happy marriage, my husband and I are separating. Even though the marriage was happy, towards the end we had started fighting way too much and too often. and even though we still ...
A. 29 June 2022: You have brought up suggestions and he shots them down, which means he isn't looking to try and fix anything.
No, he hasn't changed. He just wants YOU to suck it up and get on with it.
DO the trial separation. While you are separated focus ... (read in full...)
Husband cheated trying to do better but I am unhappy
Q. Hi all. I have been married for 8 years. Been together off and on for 16 years. I love my husband. He is the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I grew up with narcissistic parents and placed other people's feelings above mine. My...
A. 25 June 2022: Good for you OP.
And the money branch was a typo - should have been monkey-branch - you know, swing from branch to branch?
Going from one relationship straight into another rarely turns out good. Because you haven't unpacked your own issues ... (read in full...)
Should I just delete everyone after this?
Q. I’ve liked this girl for years, when we first met she had a BF, when they broke up I asked her out, but she was already seeing someone else. We’ve kept off and on contact (I have her number and socials, and recently her close friend started ...
A. 25 June 2022: EDIT:
Sorry....
You are in your 30's, you can RELY on others to make decisions for YOUR life.
Should have been...
You are in your 30's, you can't RELY on others to make decisions for YOUR life.... (read in full...)
Is there anything wrong with me keeping my opinions to myself in this situation?
Q. A lot of my friends are posting about the United States Supreme Court decision at overturning Roe vs Wade (abortion law). I am pro-life but I never talked about my views with my family or friends. Part of me feels like I am a coward for not e...
A. 25 June 2022: "Is there anything wrong with me keeping my opinions to myself in this situation?"
None.
Everyone is allowed to form their OWN opinion. Whether you want to share them or not, is ALSO your choice. You do what feels right for you.
People t... (read in full...)
Boyfriend lied about his age lost trust
Q. Hi So my boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. We have had alot of rough patches mostly because he's always asking me for financial help. Today however, I found out he's lied about his age for 3 years. He told me he was 5 years olde...
A. 25 June 2022: "We have had alot of rough patches mostly because he's always asking me for financial help."
I know it's a "thing" these days for (some) men to live off women and I don't get it. Where is their pride? Their drive? Wanting to succeed? Be self-suf... (read in full...)
Why do boys do dumb things to impress girls and each other?
Q. My question is why do boys have to do dumb stuff to show off to impress girls or impress each other? We are a small Christian school and we do not have any sports teams. There are only four boys in our 8th grade class and we girls are lucky all ...
A. 25 June 2022: "Should I tell on them or mind my business?"
You should ingore them. Plain and simple.
You are mot the school yard "Police". It's not your job (as a Christian or fellow student) to "school" a group of dumb teenage boys on how to behave.
Th... (read in full...)
Husband cheated trying to do better but I am unhappy
Q. Hi all. I have been married for 8 years. Been together off and on for 16 years. I love my husband. He is the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I grew up with narcissistic parents and placed other people's feelings above mine. My...
A. 25 June 2022: It sounds like you are making up excuses so you can money-branch to a better (hopefully) guy. Someone stable with more money. And you want others to tell you it's OK to leave your husband for the new guy.
I'm, however, not going to do that.
... (read in full...)
Should I just delete everyone after this?
Q. I’ve liked this girl for years, when we first met she had a BF, when they broke up I asked her out, but she was already seeing someone else. We’ve kept off and on contact (I have her number and socials, and recently her close friend started ...
A. 25 June 2022: "Should I just delete her of my phone and socials? "
Yes.
If she was as keen as you are, she would have made time to go out with you.
You had a crush on this woman for years. You hoped that you would have a chance with her, but you got tu... (read in full...)
Moved in with boyfriend but feeling used and miserable
Q. Hey, I am not sure what to say to my partner as I am starting to feel a little used since I have moved in with my boyfriend. Moved in with my boyfriend about a month or so ago and then he went on holiday with some of his mates leaving me to ...
A. 21 June 2022: Ah, you got conned into being his maid and dogsitter. Even though your "title" is GF, he doesn't really think he needs to put in much effort with you anymore since you now live together.
Honey, you need a life. And you need to sit him down and... (read in full...)
Update and thank you from Marcus
Q. I posted in April about a situation where my athletic trainer confessed he had a crush on me and had tricked me into inappropriate situations for his sexual gratification. When I was trying to deal with the situation I was fixated on not wanting to ...
A. 19 June 2022: I hope things keep working out for you in the best way ever! You are brave and smart. You questioned the situation, you mulled it over, and you asked for advice. And when it went to a point you could no longer handle you asked for help around you ... (read in full...)
Friend making things awkward
Q. My friend keeps putting me in awkward situations and I’m not sure if she’s doing it on purpose or not… Let me give you some examples.. The first incident was 3 months ago we went out shopping - she found this fancy scarve that she liked. It ...
A. 16 June 2022: Oh, she is a slippery one, isn't she?
She is a "gaslighter" and manipulator to the max! Makes you feel like you have to question YOURSELF whether you said something or not, making you feel a little crazy for "not remembering".
I think it's ... (read in full...)
Family never believed me that my brothers fiancé was bad news!
Q. I need somewhere to vent - I’m so angry. Several years ago my brother met this woman and it was obvious to me she was only using him. My brother is very successful, owns 2 homes and is a very generous guy. From my first meeting with her...
A. 16 June 2022: Some people CHOSE to wear blinders. You can't fix that.
Your intuition told you she was "no good" but your GROWN brother only wanted to see the good. My guess is, that he did know she was using him, but he was SO stoked that some pretty woman wa... (read in full...)
Why am I an alpha male wannabe?
Q. My girlfriend said she was so glad I was not an “alpha male.” She says it was a compliment and I believe she meant it that way, but I am feeling kind of less manly since she said it. When she realized it was bumming me out she initiated a lot more ...
A. 15 June 2022: Oh, she found your "Achilles heel" didn't she? and now she is just digging in it and salting your wounded ego for "fun"?
You are young. You will learn. Know the saying "sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me"? Alpha ma... (read in full...)
Too old to have an exciting life?
Q. Hey, I am looking for some reassurance, really. I am turning 30 this year and going through a divorce. I have been panicking a lot about this and feel like I’m now too old to live an exciting life and go out on dates etc. I have never really been ...
A. 15 June 2022: Miss out on what exactly?
People keep talking about how they have "missed out" on dating or casual sex because they were in a committed relationship or marriage. And I always think "What in the World?"!
No, you are not going to be "too old" for... (read in full...)
Should I worry that he's losing his feelings for me?
Q. Hi, so my boyfriend and I had made plans to hang out today because it is his only day off from baseball practices and games. But this morning when I texted and asked if I was going to his house or if he was coming to mine, he texted back and said he ...
A. 13 June 2022: I think you need to back off a little bit.
The more you "cling" the more HE will distance himself. You have "hung" him as your sun, your moon, and your whole universe. Don't do that. No one (besides you) can or should be your center of the univ... (read in full...)
How do I respond to mutual friends?
Q. HI again! Thank you for all the good advice you have given me. I cannot find my questions I have previously posted, so here’s a very brief recap: I managed to put an end to a lifelong friendship that had been imposed on me (a daughter of fam...
A. 13 June 2022: "So do I just say that I think that she’s doing fine and that we haven’t been in contact for over a year?"
Yes. That is perfectly fine and honest.
If she wants the details, I would just tell her in a brief manner that you have come to realize ... (read in full...)
I don't want my step-mother at my graduation
Q. Hello, thank you for taking the time to read my question. I am 24 years old, I'm graduating from university in the Summer. I'm only allowed two tickets for each parent at the ceremony, so I'm inviting my father and my mother. My Father and I...
A. 13 June 2022: Did your dad help pay for university?
If he did. I "might" feel inclined to invite him. BUT only him. Having only 2 tickets will make it "easier" to EXCLUDE" that repugnant wife of his. YOU do NOT have to meet up afterward with the evil stepmom ... (read in full...)
Don't waste your time time not doing anything
Q. I will be honest - I think times gone for me in the sense of achieving especially romanticly. Never ever in life expect things to just happen. When people say things will all work out in the end, or love only happen when you stop working for it ...
A. 12 June 2022: I absolutely agree with YCNBS,
EVERYONE follows a different path. And no one really knows which path goes where in many cases.
One of my BEST friends met her second husband at age 38. She had been married since she was 16 to a guy who was a pi... (read in full...)
Is it normal to feel empowered when you start feeling more reckless in terms of sex?
Q. Hello. I've been dealing with a tough time trying to discover who I am. I was born to a wealthy family, since childhood, my parents were very strict raising me to be a very well behaved person, and they really care about their public image and...
A. 12 June 2022: I know a LOT of young women (of any generation really) have been taught that men want "this or men want that" kind of woman. BUT what is really important is WHAT kind of woman do YOU want to be?
Having many sexual partners does NOT (let me repea... (read in full...)
This new guy told me about his 'crazy' former FWB
Q. Hello, I've been talking to this man for months and we both like each other's. However, he never talked about taking the relationship to the next level, although he spends hours with me talking non stop, watch a movie together, and I do feel the...
A. 10 June 2022: Yep, I'm with WiseOwle
You hinted at a relationship (or he PRESUMED you did) and he told you this cautionary tale of an ex-FWB who because "crazy" and wanted to date.
Having a crazy ex can happen, I would only really worry if they are "A... (read in full...)
| *oneypie's friends
These are mutual friends, so *oneypie has
added them and they have added *oneypie!
|
