A
female
age
30-35,
*aro_baby99
writes: after having my daughter 5 months ago, and her father leaving me while i was pregnant .. I Finally met someone amazing . He Makes me laugh , has a great personality , extreamly attractive , has a lot of things going for himself There's nothing i dont like about him . The chemistry between us is crazyyyyy ! We are both looking for something serious , and both addmited how much we like each other and its only been TWO WEEKS thats the crazy part . My question is , is there really anytime where sex is to soon ? When would be the best time to wait ? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2012): it really depends on you and what you expect from sex.
if you feel horny and just want to have sex, then it's never early.
but if you want to think of sex as a sign for commitment, then yes. it's too early.
A
female
reader, Anonymous 123 +, writes (26 October 2012):
Its best to wait a little while longer. Cherish the good time that you have and enjoy the budding relationship. Sex will eventually become a part of it but it shouldn't be the only thing to focus on.
...............................
A
female
reader, malvern +, writes (26 October 2012):
Very often the best relationships are the ones that started off slow. Meeting somebody new is very exciting and it's easy to get carried away but its far better to refrain from sex as long as you possibly can. Try to wait a while longer, get to know each other and try to keep an air of mystery about yourself because men love a chase. Since time began it's part of their instinct to be a hunter, to enjoy the thrill of the chase. Give in too soon and he'll have conquered you too easily and as a result may lose interest.
...............................
A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (26 October 2012):
Hi
The Chemistry you have with this guy sounds wonderful.
Guys love the chase, and how difficult the chase is. Build some strength into the relationship before you choose to have sex.
The guy will never think less of you if you choose to delay the sex a little longer. But often when the sex is served up too early and too easily then he will start to lose interest, just little, from then onwards.
Observe him, notice how he behaves on all occasions, how he talks to his friends, how reliable he is to you, keeping his word, doing what he promises,, arriving when he said he would arrive. Remembering the little details.
Establish his character, which is not the same as his sex appeal (the latter he has plenty of , obviously)
Try to take off the rose colored glasses some of the time just so your heart is not hurt if things do not continue to develop as you think they will (at this stage)
A Honorable good guy will cope with a little delay and likely cherish you more for the delay.
...............................
A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (26 October 2012):
I don't know... maybe when you just 5 months before had a baby, whose father left you when you were pregnant, then it is a time for taking things slow, and forgetting totally instant gratification ?...
And , if you both want a serious
relationship, make sure that it CAN happen, and can be serious, and get to know each other better so that you are sure that, beyond the crazy chemistry, there is also some uncrazy, in fact totally rational, actual compatibility and shared common values and future plans ?...
And that he is the right person, maybe not to be a father figure if he does not want to be, but at least a man you'd want your child to grow around ?...
That , if you mean business when you say serious. It may take a few months, yes.
Otherwise, if you feel like risking, and would not feel too bad in case of a " crash and burn " thing, you don't have to be too scrupolous and any time you want is fine, even with a just two weeks prior acquaintance. ( Only, this time, make sure you use better contracception ).
...............................
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (26 October 2012):
Until you're ready is the best time to wait. So long as its not on the first two dates you won't scare him off or something.
...............................
|