A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi, Would a guy text you every single day if he was just after sex.Me and this guy ( i know him yrs as were in the same group of friends years) had a drunken kiss at christmas.He had been trying it on a few times over the last couple of years and i laughed him off as i didnt look at him like that and though he was messing.Anyhow since weve kissed, he has txted me every single day and sometimes we spend all day chatting and joking and sometimes it gets a bit sexual.He has suggested meeting up a few times ) which i assume he means for sex) but i made excuses as dont want it only to be a one time thing as now im starting to develope feelings for him. So if thats all he is after id rather not. My question is, would he bother texting me every day for so long if he was only after sex or would he have lost interest after a few days and how do i know the difference in a guy that wants just sex versus one that would lke to develope somthing. I havent seen him since christmas.he has a gf the last couple of years and i told him i was not gonna be his bit on the side and he said he didnt want me to be....so im not sure if he wants to develope something more with me and dump her or have sex once like and leave it there...i think either way him and his gf will break up soon whether im in the picture or not as he had said before we kissed that he wanted to but think hes actually afraid of hurting her thanks and plz dont judge me for what u think is probably me encouraging contact from someone who is in relationship as i wudnt do it normally but feels right to be taklking to him every day thanks, alla dvice appreciated
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female
reader, Brokenv  +, writes (24 February 2013):
This guys just wants sex.........been there done that, broke my heart. Don't get caught in this trap. It is not worth it.
What if he was your boyfriend and doing this to you. Think about her. Think about what you want and what your needs are. This guy doesn't care or respect you as a person.
If you are interested in sex with him.....then do it, do it once and never seen text or speak with him again. Just remember you have to live with your life choices.
Good Luck
A
female
reader, Euphoric29  +, writes (24 February 2013):
Dear OP,
I don't know this man, but from my experience: Yes. Yes it's possible that a guy texts you every day just because he wants sex.
Guys don't think like women. They don't think: Hey, isn't this a bit ridiculous, to text the girl all the time when in fact all I'm after is sex? Isn't that a sign for emotional involvement? Shouldn't I be more cautious not to send the wrong signals? Isn't this weird? Nooo..
But no matter what his intentions are, though, you are right for not meeting him. He's still in a relationship and there's no guarantee he's really serious about anything, in fact, it sounds like he's just playing.
Anyway, you just kissed him when you were drunk, maybe you won't like him now that you're sober.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (24 February 2013):
 And why not ? I think most girls overestimate the importance of texts and the effort they require.
A guy who's just after sex would not bother sending you every day well thought, heartfelt LETTERS ( as they did in the in the 19th century ), but, what's the big deal in shooting some texts..? For all you know he is bored , or has got time on his hands, and he shoots you a few texts to entertaining himself WHILE grooming you for sex. It does not really take much thought or effort. People are always texting while they are hanging out with friends, or during a TV commercial break, in line at the supermarket's cash register, for all you know he could be sitting on his toilet and texting you. If you add that at times the texting becomes (cyber)sexual, ... then here the texting becomes its own reward :).
He has got a girlfriend ! Don't go building so many Spanish castles and develop assumptions while he is still with a gf. All " negotiations " and promises are null and void while he is still dating her. IF they break up, THEN you may try to have a closer look at the situation , and see if there would be room for developments ( which I doubt, since the way it started, but you never know ). But before that, prudence and commons sense require you just consider him a cheater who's trying to have a little fun on the side .
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A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (24 February 2013):
 Burn this into your emotions and your memory whenever you think of him:
If he does this to another woman, he'll do it to you. He already *is* a cheater if he's kissing you while with someone. What if his girlfriend was your best friend, or your sister, or your mother or your daughter? How would you feel about him then knowing he was completely betraying someone you loved more than anyone in the world?
Never ever ever date cheaters. It makes no difference if he's cheating on someone with you. That's even worse. None of this "I'll break up with her to be with you" because that is crap.. He wants to use you and cheat on her, or he wouldn't be talking about sex or getting physical with you before he did.
Your trust level is zero with him already. Even if he followed through, broke up with her, and dated you, you'd have zero trust because he's a cheater.
Rather than worry about you being judged, you should be severely judging HIM. If you believe any of his worthless flowery words, then you are gullible and will be easily used and tossed.
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (24 February 2013):
 hi
He just wants sex...he's trying hard too, so thinks you will cave in,your a challenge
Don't bother with him, he has a girlfriend and I don't envy her.
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