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female
age
,
anonymous
writes: How can I help my drug addict son? What ,if he never going to stop?How can I keep my sanity?He is making bad choices, and brakes my heart,when he is hurting. So every time ,he goes down on the same road, I'm there with him, so my life is never happy , because I can't enjoy it when I have such a big problem.So ,my question is there a time, when I have to be his parent, because it hurts so much? Or I have to suffer like this at the rest of my life? What is the chance for me to claim my own life? Thanks
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female
reader, adonnat63  +, writes (31 December 2008):
I really feel for you. My husband is a Alcoholic and my 25 year old son is a Addict. I too have a very hard time dealing with life. The best advice I can give you is to seek help for yourself through Al-Anon. I'm sure there is a local meeting in your area or you can get information at www.alanon.com or contact your local AA or NA chapters for more information.You have to take care of yourself or you won't be able to care for anybody else.
A
female
reader, 48years  +, writes (31 December 2008):
 It depends on the drug.
I feel bad for you because I've seen it. The heroin addict I know is also a thief to her family, a liar, and currently, an unwed mother. She is 18. She's been an addict for 4 years.
My friend's attitude, after all of the promises to recover, the promises to change etc...is to just be there for the girl without any conditions. My mom would have said, 'Never give up on your child'.
How does a mother NOT worry? I try not to worry but it keeps coming back.
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A
female
reader, blackroses2989 +, writes (31 December 2008):
 First of all how old is your son? I'm guessing he is in maybe his late twenties. While its great that you are always there for him, at the same time if he is an adult her needs to act like one. Sometimes people wantng to help someone isnt enough. They have to learn to want to help themselves. The best suggestion I can give, is to know that he has a drug problem and there may always be continuous ups and downs. While it is fabulous to have faith in him, you have ot keep in mind that he may relapse, and try not to beat yourself up over it. Its hard not to because he is your son, but you need to reclaim your life, and not be dragged down if he slips up. Try to keep an upbeat attitude and focus on yourself for a change. Explain this to him, explain how every time he slips up you feel like youve failed ( if thats how you feel, im just taking a guess) Explain to him that you will be there for him, but only he change/ help himself. Sometimes youhave to love someone enough to let them go and try to find themselves by themselves. You will always be his mom and you will always be there for him. Make sure he knows that. I'm sure he does. I'm sorry you are going through such a hard time, I hope this was helpful, all the luck in the world to you sweetie!
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