A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well see I'm just about 8 months pregnant and I'm not with the father. I have a new bf but I know it's been about 8 months I havent been with the father. I still have strong feelings for him. I'm not sure what to do. My bf hates my baby's father and I know I shouldn't but I still think about him sexually. I'm not sure what to do. I've tried not seeing him or talking to him but it just makes me think about him more and I have no clue what to do. I don't ever really see my bf because we live really far away from one another. Me and my bf havent been dating for long, I really don't think I love my bf but he's in love with me and I don't want to hurt him but then again my baby's father dosen't seem interested in me any more. I don't uderstand, I was with him for about 3 years. I just can't seem to get over him. Sometimes I wish we could just get back together. For about five months of me being pregnant me and him were still having sex, he told me he's not sure if he loves me any more but he always wanted to have sex but now that I haven't been around him he seems to act differently like he wants me but he doesn't want to say it. I like my bf but I can't get over my baby's father. What should I do?
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male
reader, rcn +, writes (19 November 2008):
 I thought I'd ask. Seeing the age range you listed, I saw that as being a possibility.
To answer your question, quite often we don't get over someone who had been a big part of our lives. It's normal. I have a 9 year old daughter, split up when she was 1, and I still love my ex. I had to accept that love and compatibility can be together and can be separate. In my situation I will always love her, but I know I can't reside in the same home as her.
Although you want to be with him, you can't force love. It may work out at some point or it wasn't meant to be. In case it does not work out, always treasure the good experiences you have with those who were close or are close to you.
I can tell by your ummm you were a bit shocked by my being blunt. If so I apologize. I'm a behavior analyst and work with so many people I save time by not beating around the bush to make a point. I hope everything works out for you.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionumm no hes not my first but i was with him for about 3 years and thats the longest i've ever been with any one
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (19 November 2008):
Take a break from the boys. Have your baby and get settled with those changes before entering into the dramatic world of dating again.
Let me ask you this. Was your baby's father the first guy you had sex with? If so, that would explain why it is difficult to move on.
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