A
female
age
30-35,
*indestress
writes:heres the scenario..we are both 16, in highschool, met when we were 14, have been dating for almost two years, i switched to a different highschool and we've been fine. I believe we are in love, we never have the stupid problems all of our friends have, and we always talk things out.We do have sex, and its always great. it does not affect our relationship negatively. We've never felt the need to breakup and we've never even had a fight where we have said that we don't love eachother. he assures me that he hasn't lost any feelings for me,and i feel the same way. but here's the deal..next year is senior year and he's going away to hockey prep school half way across the country..and we have decided we can stay together. Do you think we will be able to last, are we in love? I mean i feel like we are..and i believe it..i just don't want to be naive. please help!! especually if you knoww about LDR's!:( Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, HonningKanin  +, writes (8 November 2009):
 YOu sound very smart for your age. You have hopes, but you are also realistic and not overtly blinded by it and are looking for something, anything, for anyone to tell you it will be alright. That your worries are for nothing. I am sorry sweety. No one here has a crystal ball to tell you what you need to know. If we did we would not find ourselves in unforgiving positions in life. We tend to learn by winging it. Thats just how life is. Its ups complimented by the downs until we flatline.
I will give you two stories and both are true. Both involve couples just like your own, but very different outcomes. My mother and father in-law have both been together since they were 14 and 16. They broke up for a year and then found their way back to eachother again and havent been split up ever since. Even when his work took him over seas to the USA and she was left in Norway to wait for him. His work still does, but they manage to keep their relationship alive. Some people would say they just simply are ment to be.
When I was your age I had just finished highschool. I had a boyfriend I had been with for nearly two years and we pretty much had what sounds like your relationship. It was great. However, my parents were moving to the UK and I had to go with them and start University there. We tried to stay together, but ultimately the stress of the distance took its toll and we broke up. We are still friendly and talk, but we understand we were simply not ment to be. Even though we had everything going for us. A LDR will work if you have the comitment and intention behind it. If you think the stress is worth the reward at the end. It worked for my husband and I when we were in an LDR. You will know when an LDR is a failed one or not.
A positive thought is if you know how long the person is to be away for. Then it is a matter of a countdown.
I wish the best for you and I am not saying you both will not work and or that you should prepare for it to fail either. What I reccommend is that you both try it and see. Try not to stress or worry over it because it is pointless. It either will or it wont work and you should simply enjoy it.
HonningKanin
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