A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend finds it painful being on top since my penis is so large. But I love it when she is. Also sometimes afterwards she feels pains in her uterus.Are these pains normal? And is it best to just get used to her not being on top, or should we continually do so to let things get stretched out?
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2011): My boyfriend's not BIG, but he's a little on the bigger side, and every time we have sex, it hurts if he goes too deep unless I'm extremely turned on. (I'm always turned on around him to be honest but when I'm in the mood to have it right then, right there, it usually doesn't hurt.) I've found that if I'm on top for a while, it helps stretch out the muscles (the girl can control how far the guy goes in when she's on top, as long as the guy doesn't thrust also) in the vagina and I can eventually have him go all the way inside of me without it hurting or just with a little pressure. Maybe try more foreplay? And work on stretching out the muscles in her vagina by the way you finger her or something. Or make sure she's totally in the moment and wants you right at that moment. Good luck
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (30 January 2011):
 Things could stretch out, but it could also be she wont stretch out and just go through a lot of pain and start to dislike sex altogether or at worst get injured.
Get yourself used to her not being on top. Leave this to her to decide. If she feels comfortable with going on top then take it as a bonus. Don't ask for it or encourage it, what you need to be focusing on is to make sex pleasurable for her, not focus on whats best for you. Don't be a selfish lover.
If your penis is hurting her the answer is not to make it hurt even more... the answer is to stop doing what it is that hurts her and find a way for you BOTH to enjoy sex. In addition I will add that you and her together need to find the positions that work for you, some might even become more enjoyable for you than "her on top". But if she continues to hurt during sex she'll start associating negative things with sex and it will just put her off it altogether unless she gets to enjoy it. Have you tried using extra lubricant? Another idea is for her to get on birth-control so you wont have to use condoms. The idea is to create less friction. Starting in a position she feels comfortable with will "warm her up" sort of, and make it easier to move into other positions. Keeping the penis inside and not pulling it out during change of positions could also help. Again the idea is to cause less friction. Friction hurts when there's a big penis involved. However that's just my person experience, you need to ask her how she feels and what exactly is causing the pain/increasing the pain.
But I do know that back when I was with this guy who had a thick one, I'd bleed if I tried to get on top of him. We had to just roll over without him pulling out if I was supposed to be able to ride him, and then I was only able to for a little while until I had to call it quits. If you're one of those guys who last for longer than 20 minutes, end the session before you cum. Friction again like I said, 10 minutes of big penis will hurt less than 30 minutes. Finish off through other means like a handjob, blowjob, toys etc instead, or get yourself close to coming before having intercourse.
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A
female
reader, Br1dgette  +, writes (30 January 2011):
You're probably hitting her cervix during sex. It happens. I don't know how you guys approach sex but start with foreplay and wait until she's really hot and bothered before you attempt it. The vagina lengthens when women are incredibly turned on. Although I've never measured I read it only ever stretches out about 4 inches. Im thinking that's wrong though because my husband is definitely over 4 inches and he doesn't "always" hit my cervix.
If you already do that I really don't think there is a whole lot you can do. If you are painfully hitting her cervix she needs to ride on top carefully and you need to not thrust. If it all isn't going to go in then it's not going to go in lol.
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A
female
reader, hammyj +, writes (30 January 2011):
Pick a sex position that isn't too deep. Missionary is always good. Avoid doggy obvs. Make sure she is well aroused before you penetrate, lots of foreplay is necessary. Use extra lube, and build up your thrusts gently.
And yes of course she'll get used to it. I had to get used to a guy with a nine-inch dick and I did. The trouble is getting used to smaller penises after you've had a big one, lol!!
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