A
male
age
41-50,
*eorgeK
writes:My wife and I were out drinking with some friends, and (don't ask why, because I don't know), her one female friend asked if all guys curl their toes when they have an orgasm. I'm assuming that her husband either does or doesn't and she was curious (again, don't know why, seems like a dumb topic to bring up). Anyway, I answered, no, I don't, so I guess not. My wife spoke up and said, I know that some guys do curl their toes when they cum.Her friend questioned how she knew this, and my wife replied "because the first guy I ever gave a blowjob did that". She then proceeded to tell everyone that they were in a tent in his parents backyard with a lantern on, and while making out, she took off all his clothes so she could see him completely naked. She said he had a great body except for his feet, they were kind of big and his toes were long so she couldn't help look at them. Well long story short, she went down on him, and when he was 'near done', she heard him moan, knew he was almost there, and as he was cumming in her mouth, she was looking down his legs and saw his toes curl up really tight and his feet almost shaking while he came.I'm really pissed off,1st, that even though I knew about this guy, she implied that she never let a guy cum in her mouth except me, and even with me, she doesn't really like it, she is a 'spitter'. This was obviously a lie, and2nd, Why in the world did she tell a bunch of friends about something she did with another guy? I feel like we can't even hang around with these friends anymore. Not like any of them were virgins, or would assume she was, but this was in my opinion above the top in information you just don't share with other people. I'm really embarressed for the both of us.Do I confront her on not telling me the truth before we were married, and 2nd, how do I express my extreme displeasure (anger) at her airing out her previous sexual activities in front of others? Big blow out fight, just talk it out and make it clear that it will never ever happen again, or just ignore it unless it happens again. We're married for 2 years and this is the first time she talked in front of others about anything she did before. Thanks for all your advice.
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male
reader, GeorgeK +, writes (6 December 2007):
GeorgeK is verified as being by the original poster of the questionCollaroy is making a good point. Except 1 thing he said, I do agree with him. I totally disagree that a person's sexual past is none of their husband/wives business. It most certainly is. It is important to know whom you are marrying (virgin, slut, or somewhere 'normal'). Also, I have a friend, who like you said obsessed with his wives past to the point they broke up, however, I blame her for this, she lied to him about her past (a lot of lies). One night they were out, and he was in the men's room and overheard 2 guys speaking about his wife, and how they BOTH had sex with her. This was tramatizing to say the least, so I greatly disagree with you on that part, but everything is right. Thanks. GK.
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (6 December 2007):
 Collaroy is making quite a good point here.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (6 December 2007):
 Hi,
Yes I agree that if it makes you uncomfortable you should tell your wife it does, you have a right not to be embarrassed by your wife if it can be avoided. But you fall into the same argument that most men who post on here do. You become obsessed with your partners sex life before she met you. The details start to weigh on your mind, did she do this, but she said that, I'm sure she didnt do this, now she admitted she did that..etc etc.
Its a road to pain and suffering my friend.
Simply tell her you feel a little uncomfortable discussing your sex life amongst friends. Whether she spit, spat, swallowed, gargled or whatever is all in the past and frankly its before she met you so really its none of your business.
Your wife sounds like a person who is proud of her sexuality, you can be the envy of a lot of guys or you can be the guy who obssesses about his partner's past.
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A
male
reader, GeorgeK +, writes (5 December 2007):
GeorgeK is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the answers.With regards to the 1st issue, I guess I assumed that my wife never swallowed because she told me she didn't like to swallow with either the 1st guy, or the 2nd guy, or me. It isn't a personal thing with me (oh, and I do drink beer, so my cum must taste good huh?). I think the first time she sucked cock it just happened, and she didn't like it, and knowing my wife, when we discussed our pasts prior to getting married, it does sound a little better to say, I performed oral on 2 guys before I met you than to say, I sucked dick and swallowed cum. In her mind, I can see her thinking that would sound trashy or something. So, I'm just dropping that issue completely.Regarding the 2nd issue, I'm going to talk to her tonight or tomorrow night about how inappropriate it was to 'air' sexual talk about previous partners in front of anyone period. I'm not going to fight with her, just make it VERY clear that this kind of talk (either in public, or just with girlfriends) is completely unacceptable. I don't agree that women will talk with other women about sex relating to previous partners. It is very disrespectfull of me and our marriage. She can talk about OUR sexual experiences all she wants, but even that shouldn't be in such a public forum as this was. I'm sure we'll be fine, she will cry and appologize profusely, and this will never happen again. I'm sure we'll be completely fine, I'm just a little unsure about hanging out with those people anymore. I'm gonna be a little bit embarressed, both for me and my wife after her revealing exploits. But, we'll take it step by step with that, don't really want to lose friends, but at the same time, I need to keep face....Thanks.
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A
female
reader, Sweet-thing  +, writes (5 December 2007):
 You should simply tell your wife that telling that story was in bad taste and an embarrassment to you and in the future she should be more respectful of your relationship by not regaling tales of her sexual past. It was tacky. But after you tell her how you feel, you need to let it go so it doesn't continue to fester in your heart. And perhaps your wife 'implied' that she never swallows to avoid hurting your feelings. Ooops! Most women spit for one of two reasons. 1. They don't know the guy well enough to feel like they want their fluids. 2. They guy's sperm tastes funky. It's not about hygiene, it's about diet. My first husband's sperm was the worst tasting bitter stuff and I only swallowed it once. Never again. I can't say exactly what it was about his diet that made him taste like that; could be his lack of vegetable intact or the fact that he never drank beer. (Beer drinkers have the best tasting cum) Whatever it was, it was horrible. I just never had the heart to tell him the truth. This could be the case for you and your wife. Just a thought.
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A
male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (5 December 2007):
Seems like you are young couple and i'm not really surprised by her utterances because she's still at a stage of bragging about her sex proewess but when you are married,the only bragging you should do is about you and your hubby.Tell her you didn't like they way she's explaining things that day and made you uncomfortable.Since you too are married,i really think this isn't a big deal.Talk to her as a husband but don't pressure.
All the best.
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A
male
reader, SamuraiRick  +, writes (5 December 2007):
 If it weren't for the fact that this story of hers was told in a party setting with both male and female friends of yours to hear, I wouldn't let it bother me...
This is the kind of talk women have with each other about sex, stories that can get pretty detailed and juicy. Men do not talk about the sex with each other in quite the same way. We might say its great and all but to get into details like your wife gave that's not how we men converse with each other about sex. So consider first that your wife was actually talking to her friend about details that they might talk about any given moment, but what made it worse is she said it out loud in this audience of both women and men. I'm sure that your ego is not hurt that your wife talks this way with other women, but what she did was a bit more inappropriate with other men in the room. That's where she crossed the line. She must have had a few drinks in her and lost her judgment… You should know. You were there.
Yes it would bother me, but I don't think this is enough to start an argument over. She had lost her mind revealing such an intimate story in this crowd, even if it were about you and not this other guy. That would embarrass me just as much.
But the other part to your question about confronting her about this incident that happened in her past before she knew you, something you didn't know about until this party...well there again, its not something to start a war over. I'm sure you have never told your wife all your sex stories either. And in reality you and she don't need to know any of these details about your past sex lives. It only hurts your image of each other knowing these things. If my wife had a threesome in her past, its something I personally don't want to know about and I would think it likewise for her if I had one in my past. Some things are better left unspoken of.
So it was your wife made a big boo-boo with this story. It was a drunken moment. It was an embarrassing and uncomfortable moment for you too. My opinion is don’t go to war over it. It’s all in the past. Leave it there. Get on with your present and love your wife like you should. I'm sure you should also take a little pride in your wife as well....there had to be a few jealous guys in there after she told her story...
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (5 December 2007):
I think the real problem is not whether she lied about her habits in fellatio. The very, very bad thing is that she ashamed you in front of all these people. You're right in feeling that way about seeing them again.
The question is, why did she do it? Perhaps this was her way to complain about you. I can't know, of course, but perhaps there are pending issues between you two, and she is "getting even" in this way.
Do confront her about her telling the friends. It should be easy: simply speak up your mind. Look at her reaction: if she refuses to recognize she did wrong here, then very likely there is a hidden problem.
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