A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:This is something that's been bothering me and I'd to get some insight please.My mother has 3 other siblings... An older sister and two younger brothers. My mom's parents, my grandparents, were good people. I haven't seen much of them but I hear mum talking very fondly of them, how they brought up 4 children when money was tight and yet ensured that everyone was well taken care of, well educated, etc.That being said, all 4 of them, including my mum, chose dysfunctional partners for themselves. My father is a good person but was an alcoholic for much of his life. He didn't contribute much in any way towards the family, financially or emotionally. My mother's siblings have all chosen partners who are highly dysfunctional, terrible people. I wonder why this is. How and why can 4 children from a well rounded family end up choosing such partners for themselves? Is almost seems like self sabotage! My mother is gorgeous, a high achiever, very confident, an inspiration. My father is the exact opposite and always has been. So are the partners of her siblings. Why on earth?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (20 May 2023):
 Love is blind deaf and mute. The most intelligent people in the world can choose the worst partners! A good upbringing and all the works can't save a person if they fall in love. Love makes no sense. Look at people...you'll see all kind of matches that don't appear right. There is just no logic to love. I have been burned twice. I came from a middle class family, brought up right with all the comforts and was taught right from wrong. I should have married a nice guy...yet at 19 I married a man from the "wrong side of the tracks". He had no money, no social skills, wasn't especially good looking but I was drawn to him. Marriage lasted 2 years. He had an explosive temper, took his anger out on me, physically abusive. I chalked it up to us both being very young. I married again almost 4 years later. He came from a really nice family was educated, kind caring good looking...10 years into the marriage he turned into an alcoholic. It came out of nowhere. He became very emotionally abusive. I loved him so much yet he was toxic. Mistake #2. I had thought he was perfect. How did I screw up again?
It just happens. we pick people wrong for us for any number of reasons. Love truly is blind and makes us stupid. What else is there to say?
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