A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have a problem with getting wet. I am very attracted to my boyfriend and we have been dating for quite some time, but nevertheless Im always dry as the sahara desert. I know using lube is an option, but I was wondering if anyone knows why this is happening or any other tricks to fix this problem.. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Rihannax  +, writes (1 June 2009):
 Maybe its co he dont know what you like, or how to do wt you like, you maybe attracted to him but that doesnt mean he nos what you like.
sit down tlk about the things u like, get some toys, lube, dress up, some people even like watching porn together, play with yourself, you know how to do it, show him.
try new things, different positions, alotmore foreplay. xx
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2009): Well, I'm a guy here, but here's my story, and I think the same thing might apply.
When I was a younger, before my wife, I got hooked up with this girl. I was 19 and she was 21. On the 1st date she let me take off her shirt and bra and we messed around a litte. On the 2nd date we had sex. She was so dry it hurt both of us. I just thought it was because I'm a little bigger than average, but I played with her and went down on her for a long time before intercourse. 3rd date, same thing, painfull and not pleasurable sex. After thinking about it, she refused to go down on me at all, and never ever even touched my penis.
That was our last date, about 2 years later, I talked to the best friend of her ex-boyfriend who was right before me, and they broke up because he took her virginity and she was freaked out about it, so every time they had sex after that, she would be really dry and wouldn't get into it.
Could it be you are having 'guilty' feelings about having sex before marriage? There might be a physical problem here and KY would help, but if you are having guilty feelings for not being a virgin for marriage, you might need to speak with someone. Could be psychological.
Hope you work it out.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2009): I can never understand why the makers of K-Y Jelly haven't come up with a wall-mounted K-Y Jelly dispenser. It would save all that fumbling around in the dark in the drawer of the bedside cabinet!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2009): In addition to Anastasia's answer - which is what I would have said if I'd got there first - a 'trick' is to use some saliva. Just spit on your fingers and apply it.
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A
male
reader, CommonSpencer +, writes (1 June 2009):
I don't want to be too perverse, but oral works well to start things off with some moisture. I am no medical professional but that previous post is right. Stress can bring upon problems even in this area. Maybe try getting into the mood more, maybe some wine, and throw in whatever turns you on. I'd say find away around your stress and everything will return to normal.
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A
female
reader, Anastasia  +, writes (1 June 2009):
 Hi,
Going to through some things out at you so you can answer them yourself.
Are you emotionally stressed at work or at home and your mind is there while you are having sex?
Are you having enough foreplay?
Are you nervous?
If you answer no so far....it is best that you seek the advice of your gynae with your boyfriend.....in the meantime...KY Warming Jelly is wonderful.
I don't think it is anything to be worried about...just check with Mr. Doctor Dude.
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