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age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I wanted to ask why a guy would check out a woman's profile if he wasn't interested in dating her? I went on a date with a guy who was interested in me in the beginning he complimented me constantly and told me how much he liked the way I look, but we never went out again but keep in touch by text. He recently looked at my profile and I was curious why men do this when they make it clear that it is just a friendship?
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI had told him months after we had our date. We were friends for a while but between his jealousy and not being able to
tell me if he had any feelings it became stressful so I pulled back I never showed any signs of jealousy like he did.
I originally thought of just telling him that I cared about him so he wouldn't feel uncomfortable with the love thing.
I really don't know what men want from me and they are so confusing and I like to make things easy. I will try to take a look at that book. Thank You.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (3 February 2014):
 You went on one date and told him you loved him? That's waaaaaayyyy too fast. Too much too soon.
Next time, let the guy do the pursuing.
I have a book recommendation: "A Fine Romance" by Judith Sills PhD. It covers courtship and I think you'll find that she would tell you that you invested too much into this casual dating relationship. Your expectations were based on a lot of pretty words from the guy who wasn't sincere about them, or who meant them as a wooing ritual, not really understanding that you took them very literally.
Read the book and come back and let us know what you think.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (2 February 2014):
 I am sorry this happened to you. Try resisting telling a guy you love them until you are in an established relationship because it's just a bit much for someone to hear if they arn't really feeling the same way.
Don't worry about keeping touch with him because you won't get what you want and he has made this clear.
Sometimes people so desperately want to be 'in love' and 'be loved' that it makes them grasp at the first person who shows them attention, but it's not a good way to find the love of your life.
Date lots of people, meet just for the sake of meeting and having fun and try not to see people as potential partners, that way, it takes the intensity out of you and allows you to be a little more relaxed...and the 'L' word, hold it back until you are properly seeing someone!
Good luck x
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for all the compliments. I have really tried with this guy, I told him that he was a good kisser on our first date, and that I loved him, then he said it was a bit much so he only wanted to be friends on the text. I did it for a while because I felt at least he is communicating with me, but it wasn't what I really wanted from him. I wanted to be his girlfriend.
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female
reader, Euphoric29  +, writes (22 January 2014):
Dear OP,
If a guy has been single for some time, he gets hesitant to give up this new found freedom and commit to somebody new. So, after the first date, he might have decided he isn't ready to go further.. or he thought you're good looking, but you don't have much in common. It's pretty normal in the dating world that this happens. Especially if you meet online.
Why is he still contacting you, then? One possibility is that he would actually like to see you again, but is very, very busy. Another is that he's too shy to tell you he doesn't want to, so he thinks he's letting you down easy. Or he is seeing a few woman at the same time (including you), so he's busy but trying to keep you "warm".. so that if it fails with the others, he still can see you again. He might be looking at your profile to make a final decision about things. Remembering you, looking at your pictures, re-reading your profile text.
If I was you, I would just go ahead and look for somebody new. If a guy is interested, he will try to see you again and not just make a few compliments or text. That's just lazy and undecided behavior and you don't have to put up with that. He's had his chance.
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (21 January 2014):
Maybe he has a memory the size of a pea, forgot he's gone on a date with you and looked at your profile again and then dimly remembered?
I would stop the texting relationship and let him go off into the mists of time.
His not asking you out again does not mean you are not dateable or desirable. It just means he didn't ask you out again, for whatever reason is particular to him.
I'd stop focusing on him and this date and ignore him from now on. He's way too forgetful. Including forgetting that the dating sites logs stuff like visits to your profile.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (21 January 2014):
 Curiosity?
I wouldn't worry about it, he wasn't "it" for you so whatever he does.. who cares. Don't get stuck on a guy who wants to be "Friends".
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female
reader, cmarieky +, writes (21 January 2014):
It really doesn't mean much. Just thought of u and that is all. It's natural. Sometimes the dumpers of relationship will call or look back at ex photos doesn't mean they want them back. The person is just on their mind. And it's possible for him to miss your company without wanting to date.
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A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (21 January 2014):
 If a woman looks at your profile does that mean she's a lesbian and wants to date you?
Looking can mean all sorts of things, but in this case I wouldn't read more into it. If the man wanted to see you that badly he'd be calling you and making arrangements.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (21 January 2014):
It doesn't mean anything. Maybe he looked at your profile by mistake or maybe he was comparing you to someone else?
That's how it goes with dating sites. People get excited and make lots of promises before they meet and when they actually do meet, many decide the 3D version is not the right one for them.
Don't take it personally. He might no see you as someone he could have a relationship with but may think you'd make a good friend. It's up to you if you want to just be his friend. Trouble with making friends with guys from daating sites is that they will probably drop the friendship if they meet someone they do want to date...also so might you.
If you dont want him looking at your profile, you can always block him.
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