A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Hi, Aunts! Of late, I've been speaking with one of my friends who is married for 2 months now. The issue is that he has fallen for me and won't even accept or acknowledge his marriage, when I already have seen their pictures (why would he lie to a friend! It irked me to a great extent!) He gave the utmost lame story. Anyway, I don't have any feelings for him, I only like the civil friendship. Besides, I am getting married with the man I love later this year. I've told my friend everything about my situation and want him to stop with all his intentions. But he NEVER backs off( he tried to kiss me!) , says that I love him but won't admit...which is a hoax. What can I do to get rid of this situation? I am a simple woman who loves a peaceful life. Thanks! Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2017): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you, all the Aunts.
Your views were indeed helpful. I feel better now to cut him off my life. Seems like the burden which haunted me has gone away.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (19 January 2017):
Hope the no contact rule goes well. You will be much happier without him in your life am sure.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2017): he does not sound like a decent human. You sound like you are one, then why be friends with him? People establish friendship only with ones who are like minded and carry the same level of morality.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (19 January 2017):
I agree with Cindy.
This is not a friendship at all. He wants more and is willing to lie to try and get you.
Stop meeting up with him and block him from further contact. Do you really think your soon to be husband would be happy about this? And about you allowing what's been going on so far?
CUT this guy off. Why keep this drama in your life?
...............................
A
female
reader, 02DuszJ +, writes (19 January 2017):
He sounds kindof rapey/ sexually aggressive.
Any decent guy takes NO for NO. Pestering women for sex is kindof a sign he's a sex pest.
I agree with cindy, scrrew civil friendship, have nothing more to do with him and threaten him with police if he carries on.
Honestly i feel so sorry for his wife, I would probably let her know what her husband's been doing- she needs to see the light. Poor poor women.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2017): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much for your advice.
And you're right. He is being pushy, but I want this drama to end. So will be cutting all communications with him henceforth.
...............................
A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (19 January 2017):
I think you have to gave up to the " civil friendship ": You can't be real friends with people who want something different or something more than friendship from you. This guy clearly is sexually attracted to you and he hopes that if he is aggressive and persistent, he will wear you down and convince you to cheat on your bf ( and on his wife ).
You say that you have explained him the situation very clearly, so he should know that he has no chances to make anything happen with you. But, alas, some people just won't listen until you say things nicely and act kindly- with some people you need to be totally assertive. I think he feels that, the very fact that you still accept to talk to him after he has tried to kiss you, IS an encouragement.
If you really like a simple peaceful life- then cut out from it any chance of confusion, arguments and turmoil. You can have " civil friendships " only with men who do not want to get into your pants. He does,- so just stop communicating with him, block him on social media, and have no scruples in ignoring him socially from now on.
...............................
|