A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I have been involved with a man for nearly 6 yrs and recently has started leaving some of his things at my place. Nothing special just a couple of changes of clothes for when he chooses to stay over.When I saw him over the weekend I told him that he would need to start using the key that I was about to give him due to the fact that when I am in my room with the AC on I can't hear anyone knocking at the door.He was very hesistant to take it at first but eventually took it and stuck it in his pants pocket.Help me to understand what this all means. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (14 June 2010):
The female aunts below have pretty much summed this up. From a male point of view, a key represents more commitment. And if in 6 years he's not totally moved in or committed, and he was hesitant to take they key, I'd say that he has commitment issues.
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (14 June 2010):
 Yeah, 6 years seems like a very long time to wait until you're at that stage, and it's a symptom of the same hesistation to commit as the key thing. Taking a key is a nod to a new commitment to each other.
Given your age, I'm assuming that he's around the same age? Usually, people not wanting to commit or be married have been set in their ways, and accepting a key bucks the "set in your ways" attitude towards commitment.
I wouldn't worry about it. It fits with the whole relationship, to be honest. What matters is that he took it. Don't make it a big deal, and he'll get used to it.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (14 June 2010):
 You've become familiar with each other. He hasn't proposed to you and by giving him the key, you are treating him sort of like a husband without cohabitating. He can come and go as he pleases yet he doesn't get the warm welcome from you. You won't be greeting him with a grin at the door, you would be sitting inside a room, and there's no surprise anymore to see him. The thrill from the days you are dating are gone. I also imagine if my boyfriend says to me I need to use this key, he would sound like a landlord, rather than a romantic boyfriend. Maybe it's the way you worded it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThis wasn't the first time I tried to give it to him.
The last time before now was about 6 months ago.
Maybe he's ready for something more serious.
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