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Why my wife feel pain when fingered inside?

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Question - (13 January 2011) 6 Answers - (Newest, 14 January 2011)
A male Belgium age 41-50, anonymous writes:

My wife loves when I finger her clitoris. But when I try to finger inside she feel pain even when it was a gentle touch. Is this a common problem? Is there a way to avoid the pain? Thanks in advance.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2011):

its called "vaginismus". Please see a gynecologist. My wife has the same problem.

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A female reader, angelDlite United Kingdom +, writes (13 January 2011):

angelDlite agony aunthi

has this always been a problem or is it something recent? do you keep your fingernails well trimmed? it is not normal to feel pain inside and i think she should DEFINITELY see her doctor as soon as possible. this could have a variety of medical causes, so best to get treatment or just reassurance

xx

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (13 January 2011):

Tisha-1 agony auntDoes she actually WANT you to finger her inside? Maybe she doesn't really like it and the easiest way to get you to stop is to tell you it hurts. Men often think the vagina is like the inside-out penis, that the sensations we get from having it stimulated is like the ones you get from having the penis stimulated. That is not the case.

Fingers are different than penises in the way they feel. Fingers have fingernails which can hurt, bones which can create sharp angles. Men's hands can be rough with chapped skin and there's a possibility that you are not being as gentle as you think.

Watch her as she masturbates. Many women do not insert anything into their vaginas when they masturbate, penetration is not necessary for pleasure, believe it or not. I know men get very focused on the vagina as being the seat of their pleasure, but generally for women, it's the clitoris that matters. The vagina isn't the source of all their pleasure.

If the pain exists with intercourse as well, your wife needs to see her gynecologist.

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A female reader, Blonde68 United Kingdom +, writes (13 January 2011):

Blonde68 agony aunt

No it isn't normal to feel pain inside and she should get this checked out!

My mind is now working overtime... does she not feel the same pain when you have intercourse??

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2011):

Are your finger nails long? Maybe your stabbing her if they are.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (13 January 2011):

Honeypie agony auntMaybe just stay on the outside? She may not be comfortable with a finger inside her.

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