A
female
age
30-35,
*pset and confused
writes:So I had been with my ex for about a year. We broke up once but he came crawling back after two weeks. Well he just broke up with me again about three weeks ago. We live together and he said that we can both still live there just have separate rooms. At first he said that we might get back together in awhile, but then two days ago randomly text me and told me to stop being a baby and get over him and that we will never be back together. Every time I see him at the house he goes out of his way to be mean to me. Why is he acting like this all of a sudden? Is he trying to hid his feelings or push me out of the house? He said that it doesnt hurt him to see me there but how can this be? Please help!
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broke up, get back together, my ex, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, upset and confused +, writes (21 May 2010):
upset and confused is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe are both on the lease along with another couple that are our best friends. We have 9 more months left on it! I really dont want to move! He is never here and I actually am and hang out with our friends. He is just getting drunk and being stupid every day now. And yes that was also my post. I have looked into that disorder and it describes him very well. I know that I sound stupid, I dont want to get back together with him. I just want to be able to be civil so that I can still hang out and do the same things. As of now he is pulling power trips and is telling me that I cant go places that he will be even if all of our friends are giong to be there too and telling our friends not to talk to me until things calm down! And we both got invited to the same place tomorrow and Saturday night and both accepted. He doesnt know that I am going though. How can I get him to be civil!?
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (21 May 2010):
 Hi there, is this your post too? http://www.dearcupid.org/question/he-says-its-over----is.html
The bit about 3 weeks ago and the telling you not to be a baby sound the same.
I think this ties into your other post and just reinforces the amateur diagnosis we've made of him being a narcissist.
It think you're just seeing a little bit of the guy behind the mask now.
As for moving out, I think you should read your lease. Who signed it? What are the terms? How long do you have left on it?
Start getting practical now. You're fretting about his feelings and you should be planning and working through your options. Don't be helpless here, know what your options are. Get smart.
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A
female
reader, upset and confused +, writes (21 May 2010):
upset and confused is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks caringguy,
I just feel so stupid. I tried so hard but it didnt work. He is making it seem like I am the only making him act this way. But even our mutual friends say he is being weird and not the same person. He just got a new job that starts in a week. Do you think he will calm down? He is the kind of person that likes to go to bed at 1030 and hes been out until 4-5 am every day! He also never wanted a Facebook but then got one after we broke up and is posting pictures of him with drunk girls. Think this is just to bug me? I also dont want to be so into myself that I think all of his actions have everything to do with me. It makes me feel a little narcisistic
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (20 May 2010):
He's taking his anger and frustration out on you, because it's easier to do that than accept he has made his own mistakes. I think this is a pattern with him. To break and come back means nothing. I still think it's time for you to get away from him.
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A
female
reader, upset and confused +, writes (20 May 2010):
upset and confused is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI have brought up moving to him. He says that there is no way that he is going to move. Which I dont think is right since he broke up with me and is the boy. He also has more places to go than I do since all of his friends basically live in frat type houses.
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A
female
reader, upset and confused +, writes (20 May 2010):
upset and confused is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks caringguy,
I just cant tell if he regrets getting back together the first time and is saying that it wont happen again? Or if this is just a pattern with him? I have been the only girl that he has ever gotten back with (I have heard that this wasnt his choice. After he left the girls they didnt want him back). So I am confused if I pushed him away or if this is just him and how he acts? I mean he is going out of his way to be mean. He woke me up when he got home at 5am on a Sunday by calling me and telling me to come unlock the door, but he had his keys! Why would he do that? Just to be mean or to show me when he is dragging in the house? He also has lost his job now and is drinking everynight with the boys! Im so confused
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (20 May 2010):
Seems like he is hurt. Men often have a delayed reaction when it comes to reactions. Women can often work out how they feel within a few minutes. With men, it can take a few days, even weeks to work out how we feel. I think you need to end this right now and get away from him. He's broken it once before, and come crawling back. Now he's done it again and is being a bit pathetic about it. That's the sign of a man you don't need in your life. He'll continue to act this way. You need to try and get away from him, and take as little notice of him as possible.
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