A
female
age
30-35,
*pendy
writes:Why is my boyfriend doing this? Is he cheating?my boyfriend left his facebook on and i went through his messages..i felt soo bad but am glad i did cos i found out hes been talking to lots of girls...those girls hardly have any clothes on in their pictures.his relationship status says single... yet he claims he loves me soo much and never want to lose me. yet hes calling other girls, babe, darling, honey...just like he calls me. told one of the girls that shes beautiful..wtf?i met a guy today..we were both attracted to each other at first sight and i gave him my number.. i told my bf and he didn't sound happy.am so confused.. cos i love my bf so much...whys my bf doing this? what should i say to him?we are both 21thanks...xx
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female
reader, Hyz'fantasieGyrl  +, writes (21 December 2010):
 well your boyfriend is like most men they can give but cant take. hes doing you wrong but when you turn around and do the same thing he dislikes it. hes talking to other girls becouse hes probely need to adventure out a little more or it could be that hes just trying to be a player.
A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (21 December 2010):
 [If] you love your boyfriend so much, then why add to the issues of giving another guy your phone number? It's said that two wrongs don't make a right, but in relationships, two wrongs creates a bigger mess. So, unless you're prepared to dump your boyfriend for the guy you're attracted to, giving your number was the wrong move.
Is there a difference? When you say these girls are in skimpy dress, chances are his flirting is fantasy. It doesn't make it right, but are these girls local? Does he have physical access to them? The guy you gave your number to is local, where you have access, therefore cannot be considered fantasy, but an option that you may or may not choose. It has nothing to do with your love for your boyfriend, but with what you desire. In a way his does too, but there is a difference between intent to be with someone, and fantasy without having access to do so.
I don't know what his reasons are. You didn't give any, or any explanation that he may have. You only gave yours. I will say, in my view, your claim of really loving your boyfriend was greatly weakened by your actions, as your giving him your number shows how easily your boyfriend is replaceable to you.
You two need to discuss what is going on. Whether you will be staying together or not (the chance of that is probably less as well, after you told him you gave the number). I tell you this because what you did changed the game. It was an issue with his facebook, now it's an issue with you choosing someone else, where your giving your number confirms your change of choice. Can you see how destructive adding an issue to the present issue may be?
In my life, I'm about choices and I know there are others who are the same. If I have a girlfriend, she's not obligated to be with me, she chooses to be, as I do with her. I'm hard on you here because of my prospective. If I were your boyfriend, even if I had this facebook crap going on, and you said you found attraction and gave your number to someone else. I would see that as choosing someone else, and would tell you goodbye. It wouldn't matter how I felt about you, what would is how your actions display my meaning to you.
Now you need to decide what you're going to do. Talk to your boyfriend and have some possibility of working things out, and keeping the guy you say you love. or Decide it's over and walk away. The problem here is that you, in a way, replaced him without any talking or trying to reconcile. That can cause issues that would lead to greater confusion and you could end up self destroying what the relationship could be, by taking the actions you took. I don't think that is your intent, but that could end up being the outcome. It's always better to talk things out, then if things don't work out, give your number to someone you're attracted to.
Take care.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2010): When men keep their relationship status as single when they're in a relationship with someone, it says it all. It means they aren't ready to publish their relationship because they still want to flirt with women - as proven.
He may like you, but he likes the single life more. You should clearly end it with this guy. I'm afraid he doesn't love you. You should end it with him and perhaps give it a go with the other guy?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2010): What your boyfriend is doing isnt acceptable, however have you tried talking to him about it?
I would also mention his relationship status also, as he could just be using it to flirt with other girls.
Depending on his answers you may need to consider if you want this relationship or not
Goodluck :)
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