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female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: my boyfriend and I moved together 3 months ago.I started getting very stressed because he wouldn't clean at all. I told him, we had an argument he got a bit better,but later he keept neglecting everyhting.We had around 3-4 arguments about this, until he started doing dishes and he cooked one time.Sometimes he surprize me when he does the bed and I am ultra thankful.He has not cooked again.He is a cook that doesnt like to cook.Last think was the I made an itinarary where some days he would cook ( 3 times a week ) and I would cook the rest of the days.He ageed, but nothing happened. Now my grandma is sick and me and my dad need to take care of her.My boyfriend had been supportive, till yesterday when he told me if I stay more than 4 days a week with my grandma during the night he is "going to have probelms with me", I Take care of her from 6pm -11am, go to work at 11:30am till 5pm and go home to cook, stay home one night and nex day at 6pm back to my grandmas. Am I doing something wrong, I feel like whatever I do someone gets upset at me - my dad for not taking care of my grandma enough or my bf for not spending enought time with him....do I have an unconsidered boyfriend? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, 2old4this  +, writes (9 April 2009):
 I will say this much in his defense. He probably kept house just like this when he was living single. Unless he lived at home until now which means he never really had to do that stuff because his mom probably did it. Not saying he's right, i'm just sayin. And he probably just assumed you would take care of the cooking and cleaning. Again, not saying that is right. The bottom line is this is not at all like he invisioned. This is why people need to talk about there expectations in detail before they do something like this. So, tell him what you expect and ask him what he expects. If you guys are just too far off from each other then maybe you should move out.
A
female
reader, niki20 +, writes (9 April 2009):
 when a girl is in a house a guy would expect the things from her. seeing is how your guy is a cook he probably doesnt want to cook. try making an arrangment were you cook he cleans up. if that doesnt work, then just leave the dishes he will get mad but maybe it will get your point across, take a day off of the house work
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