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Cant get my boyfriend to come...what am I doing wrong?

Tagged as: Sex, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 April 2009) 6 Answers - (Newest, 9 April 2009)
A female Australia age 41-50, anonymous writes:

No matter what I do it takes my boyfriend ages to come or he doesn't come at all.

We do every position known to man, heaps of foreplay (at least half an hour of mutual kissing, touching masturbation), I give him oral sex for ages but I just cannot make him come.

Its worse because I do several times per 'session' and feel guilty for enjoying myself so much when he is clearley NOT!!!!

he faked an orgasam the other day and I KNOW it, the condom was empty and he stayed erect for an hour after his attempt at being an actor.

he has a very large penis, iv heard guys with big ones take ages to come is that true? Also I feel like i may be becoming less tight as we have sex a LOT and at the start it was really hard for me to take him and now its no trouble lol.

What do you think the reason could be?

Am i just not rocking his world?

I love him but i dont want to spend the rest of my ife working my ARSE off to make him blow it shouldnt be THIS hard to make a guy come.

View related questions: condom, foreplay, kissing, oral sex

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2009):

This is definitely a mental / emotional problem - he just literally is not 'letting himself go'. This might be something that has happened in the past? It will be tricky to talk through as he might take it personally but I would have thought surely he wants to come too!! If you make it clear you are not judging him and ask him whether there is anything else you can do you can only try. The alternative is to abstein for a bit and see if this takes the pressure off both of you.

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A male reader, DoubleM United States +, writes (9 April 2009):

DoubleM agony auntWell, I must agree that you should ask him about this. He knows why and should explain.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2009):

Iv tried talking to him about it, he just says that he takes a while to come

iv tried asking him to be more vocal during sex but he is so quiet so i dont know if im doing things they way he likes them, he says i am but im not so sure

he has an erection most of the time when we are alone lol so he obviously thinks im alright but i dunno.......

any more ideas anyone??/

I draw the line at anal...

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A female reader, niki20 United States +, writes (9 April 2009):

niki20 agony auntyou can do keegle excersises to make it tighter. your not doing anything wrong, is his mind in it?? try spooning and cross one leg over the other while hes in u it would make you feel tighter. if he cant go let him do you in his way, that way you can figure out what makes him tick, maybe he even has a secret fetish.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2009):

Have you talked to him about what specific things 'rock his world'? He should be able to give you some insight as to what does it for him. Apart from that I would make sure that htere are no distractions around. You are right though, it shouldnt be this hard to do. Have you talked to him about it at all? I mean is it possibly a medical condition? As far as your becoming less tight just make sure you do those kegals try this link below for help with that.

www.dearcupid.org/question/how-do-you-make-your-vagina-tighter.html

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2009):

It is him. It has nothing to do with his size. If he's hard, he's enjoying it, so enjoy yourself or just ask him if there's anything u can do differently (it's not going to change). Some guys have trouble cumming, others have trouble not cumming, and others have trouble staying/ getting hard. It's just how it goes.

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