A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi, im very confused.im 27weeks pregnant and living with my partner, iv been with him for 1year and 3months, after all the bills and rent my partner has about £100 spare a month. i cant claim any benifits as he works over 24hours a week and gets over 16 grand a yr. we was told id beable to claim the £500 baby grant so never thought about saving much money until last month. last night i found out he has been paying his exs bills, even tho he denys it. it makes me really mad because we cant afford to get any baby things for example, cot, sterilizer, pram, clothes etc yet hes paying his exs bills, it feels like me and my unborn baby are 2nd best to his ex, like we dont matter and are not as important. does he still love her? does he want to be with her? he says he hates her guts and doesnt want her. he says "if i wanted her id be with her, im with you and want you, get it into your head" then why is he paying her bills? they have a child together but that doesnt mean he has to pay her bills surely?? we only have £100 spare a month yet he splashes out on stuff for the house, take aways and paying child matanance as well as her bills, is he hiding a secret sourse of money or something, i might be blonde but no way would be be able to afford all our bills, all her bills, luxuries and painting things for our house. he says we can afford baby things aswell.. im soo confused!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Starlights +, writes (17 October 2009):
 Do you have any evidence he is paying her bills? i mean real hard evidence and not hearsay? unless you know 100% for sure he is doing this then you would have to take his word for it (for now).Like CaringGuy says do some digging and find out the real truth.I would advise find out if he definately is paying her bills and what amounts and when.Of course you and the baby should come first! Dont panic but try and get to the bottom of this before you reach any kind of decision.Good luck.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (17 October 2009):
If he's paying bills for his ex, you'd better do some digging. That is a really bad sign. He needs to come clean. You are right to be worried. If you've broken up with someone and you're not tied to them, you don't pay their bills.
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