A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Its quite a long post but I'm so close to giving up so I'd like some advice before I do.I'm 18 and he's 20, we've met up a few times, I met him during the summer but things progressed with us in mid-august, he was very straight forward, he kissed me to show that he liked me, he told me he liked me and that he wants to see me again, etc...We met up around 4 times in one week during august and I haven't seen him since.We both have blackberries, so we have each other on blackberry messenger cause its much easier to talk, however it's coming up to 4 weeks since I last saw him, and he doesn't talk as much as he used to but on some days he'd talk a lot. There's days where we've planned to meet up but then he tells me last minute that he can't make it, there's other days I'd ask him what time I'm seeing him and I just wouldn't get a reply back, there's days he would ask me if we can meet up and I'd agree but then something would come up and he wouldn't come.In other words, he's been pretty disappointing in these last 4 weeks. What I don't understand is, why is he asking to see me? And agreeing to meet up with me if he's not going to come? At this rate I've totally given up on any hope of seeing him again, funny thing is he lives 10 minutes away by car. Some days we'd agree to go out in the evening at around 8/9pm, one thing I do know is that he's always out, he's always out and about with friends, cousins or family, that's just how he is, so there have been times he has reached home at around 10/11pm and then its been too late to see him so we pick another day to meet but the same thing tends to happen again.Even with all this going on, he's really off with me on some days and really nice to me on other days.I just cannot figure him out? Some would say "he's just not that into you" but why does he keep agreeing to go out or asking me to go out if he doesn't wanna see me, wouldn't it be soo much easier if he replied saying "sorry I won't be able to make it, I'm busy that day" atleast that way I won't be getting disappointed cause we would never have agreed to meet in the first place.What do you guys think?
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (16 September 2011):
 Old trick.You are the back up plain, a.k.a. the option.
He is not super interested , as you suspect yourself, but not so uninterested that you don't make an excellent " just in case ".
So, let's say that Tuesday sounds pretty free, nothing special to do, he'll call you and fix for Tuesday. Then something more interesting comes up , which can go from a boys' night out to another " newer " girl, ( these guys who are always out and about tend to play over different fields ) and he'll have no qualms in cancelling last minute , or standing you up altogether.
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