A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Brace yourself people this is going to be a long oneGrrr, right what is wrong with all the males I meet after reading this question please do not tell me that I need to stop going for the same kind of guy because really everything about the guys I meet are different except for one thing they are players!!!Okay so there have been three guys so far I will start with guy number one - I met him just over two years ago and we were really good mates but then he started to have feelings for me (so he said) and he would wine and dine me and whisk me off me feet to all these amazing places making me feel like I was the most important person in the world after a while I simply asked him what was going on between us and he turned round and said quite bluntly "Oh im not looking for a relationship I just think im going to sleep around for a bit you know" Arghhhh!!! Im not looking to be messed about although I wasnt too bothered about this one as my feelings for him werent too strong at all and I moved on with ease I was just annoyed.Then we have guy number two hes the worse out of the lot for me because I completely fell in love with guy number to and admittedly I am still very much in love with him now I met him just over a year ago we had a laugh together and got very close over the year and he just made me feel so amazing when he used to hold me in his arms and kiss me on the forehead I just fell for his charm and thinking of him now it just makes me want him so much now he does like me except again I asked him what he was looking for and he replied "I dont want a relationship until I have myself sorted" which I can understand but I dont want to have to wait around for him dont get me wrong when I see him now hes still such a gentleman and treats me with the upmost respect but he's looking for something im not a no strings relationship which is what I cant do.Guy number 3 well this one was a kind of way to try and get over number two stupid I know but this one basically told me that I was the most amazing person he had ever met that I was beautiful and that he had really fallen for me then of course a couple of weeks after this he said "I dont think I want a relationship I just want to play the field"Why do I keep meeting guys that dont have any true feelings for me? Admittedly number one and number three well I dont care for them but guy number two im still in love with like I said.
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female
reader, cherrysundae19  +, writes (12 January 2009):
I completely 100% understand your frustration. I swore up and down to all my friends that I kept meeting jerks for about 2 years. I seriously had a new guy every month...no joke. I got the don't give sex up so quickly speach tons of times. You might possibly be sending off a vibe that you dont even know your doing. First off I would suggest for you to stop looking for a guy (that's if you are even doing that now), wait for him to come to you. It has to be so unexpected, which I feel are the best. In the meantime, find things to entertain yourself and enjoy being you. When it comes time to do the dating thing with a new guy, relax and play it cool. If for even one second they think you have baggage of any sort they will run!! I told myself in the beginning of July I was done looking for men, and then two weeks later out of no where a local police officer saw me in front of my house and we talked a bit and exchanged phone numbers and now its 6 months later and AMAZING! Enjoy life, we all have somebody and he will come to you. #2 sounds like he could have potential, give him time.
A
female
reader, Libra1963  +, writes (12 January 2009):
 Like the last Aunty said - don't let men use you. You will end up feeling worse for wear. Thank God you have not got children yet as far as I can ascertain.Have fun and keep things light. Let relationships take the natural toll. Read "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus". Taught me a lot. My man now runs after me.
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A
female
reader, sheribaby38 +, writes (12 January 2009):
 You know the first thing I've learned is that when you bring up the subjects of commitment and asking too soon where your relationship is going it freaks men out. Just relax and keep things friendly. Don't sleep with them and don't act too needy. Keep things relaxed and conversations about other things would be better. Like travel, hopes, dreams, learn some funny jokes and go listen to music together but don't bring up topics like that any more, your freaking them out. It will happen naturally and I think you just haven't met mr. right yet, just a bunch of mr right nows. Same thing as me... you're not alone.
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A
male
reader, 2old4this +, writes (12 January 2009):
 Yea, guy number two sounds ok. He was honest with you that he doesnt want a relationship right now. All you can do is worry about yourself and do whats best for you. The right guy will come along as long as you put yourself out there. It could be number two I don't know. Also don't be in such a hurry you got plenty of time trust me.
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