A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:When I first met my boyfriend it was in a "business only" relationship. At that time he was in a "bad relationship", that was pretty much sexless, that took him three years to finally get out of. When I first met him I liked him very much as a person but was not attracted to him. Fast forward three years later, he and girlfriend break up and he starts calling me. He says he always liked me. I resisted his advances because I thought of him as "friend only " material and he obviously wanted more. I guess there was something about him I liked from the start because I kept seeing him while thinking I really have to let him know I don't think this is going anywhere. He pursued me in spite of my reluctance and eventually he "grew on me". I started becoming more attracted to him when I realized what a great guy he is. He didn't come on to me sexually for three months (after I told him in the beginning that I was not the type to jump into bed with him). When we did have sex it was a little slow on his part the first couple of times, I think because he was nervous. He still made sure that I was satisfied. He said him and his ex rarely had sex and he was nervous because he knew "I was the one" and that before he met me he was wondering "if it still worked any more." Starting with the third time we made love the sex has been amazing. I am now very attracted to him and I truly wonder how his exes could not want to have sex with him when he's such a great lover. (His ex-wife didn't either) The problem is, that it seems like now that he's "got me" he doesn't want to have sex that often. Once a week is good for him but I'd like to do it 3-4 times a week. There have been times I have been lying next to him naked rubbing my body against his and he says he's really tired and turns over and goes to sleep. I don't know how he can do that if he truly loves me and is as attracted to me as he says he is. This has truly never happened to me with another man. We've been together for only six months. He tells me things like; I'm the best in bed he's ever know, he wants to be with me forever, I'm the first woman that has ever given him regular blow jobs (which of course he loves)and generally he loves sex with me. He is thrilled that he finally found a woman that he loves having sex with that he knows "won't turn him down."He has no problem getting and keeping erections and is amazing in that area for a man in his mid fifties( I'm about the same age). I always heard that with men his age erections are different but with him you can literally "hang a towel from it" and he stays hard for a long time. He tells me he has never taken a sexual enhancer with me and I believe that he would tell me if he had. He says he's never needed one with me. My questions are why doesn't he want sex more often and is there a reason he always wound up with women who didn't want to have sex with him? Is it possible that he thinks I'm "too easy". I've asked him to have his testosterone levels checked but he would have to pay for it out of pocket and he's trying to save some money right now. If his levels were low would he still be able to get and stay as hard as he does when we do have sex?Why when I finally meet a man who turns me on sexually does he not want sex that often? With my previous partners it's always been the other way around. Could it be that I'm not a challenge like his other women were and that's why he doesn't want it that often? I've tried talking to him about it but haven't gotten a good answer and I don't want to pressure him about it. If his sex drive is this low after six months what will it be like if we stay together long term? I would appreciate any thoughts or ideas.
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blow-job, erection, ex-wife, his ex, money, sex drive Reply to this Question
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male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (24 September 2014):
 Where we you 20 years go? Flip that entire scene upside down and you'll see what a lot of men my age feel about their wives(we ask it all the time where did my wife go?)At about age 50, we men begin to falter in our drive(low T,BHP, all kinds of things go south) the main thing though Ithink is thewives egin to gointo thir "re-virination phase) where their drive goes into space(a parking space)Ty begin to wear cover all clothing and get all ("no i won't perform that on you anymore") So it cuts both ways. Good Luck
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (24 September 2014):
 I am sure that the Uncles are more qualified than me to answer, but I just want to say that if he is in his mid fifties, once a week sounds pretty normal and average. Of course there may be individual exceptions of mature insatiable studs, but , for his age, once a week is not a particularly LOW sex drive.
Plus, his erection may have been not affected by age, but is refractory time sure was ( the time it take his to be ready for another round after intercourse ). A boy of 18 can be ready in 10- 15 minutes, to a man in his mid 5os it takes a few HOURS, some times even 18-24.
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