A
female
age
30-35,
*ove.
writes:So I was wondering whether I am right to be concerned that my boyfriend never gets jealous of other guys looking at me or get jealous at all, why? Is it because I'm a virgin?
View related questions:
jealous Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2012): The reason he is not jealous is because he believes that you will not leave him for another guy and he trusts you. You should be thankful that this man is not insecure
A
female
reader, Love. +, writes (29 July 2012):
Love. is verified as being by the original poster of the question I thought it was normal because of boyfriends ive had in the past have always been jealous. Thanks for all your advice, I will go thank my lucky stars I have a wonderful boyfriend!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2012): Why should he be jealous? You're his woman, not theirs.
I'd wouldn't be jealous either, I would be proud because you have chosen me and not them.
...............................
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (29 July 2012):
 because jealousy is an emotion rooted in insecurity and he's not insecure about himself or your relationship.
it's a very good thing.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2012): OP a lot of girls get the very wrong idea that jealousy is somehow a good thing. It's not, not even slightly.
Jealousy isn't "proof" that a guy loves you, it isn't a cute thing it's a wild emotion that can be very damaging and poisonous in a relationship. The only acceptable form of jealousy is that kind of mild envy when you say win 100 bucks in a competition and he's like "ah you lucky fecker well done." Even then some people can be overly jealous and resentful.
You're not right to be concerned, you'd be right to be concerned if he did get jealous OP because jealousy leads to possessiveness, to controlling behaviour, to fights and arguments and it can be one of the first signs that a guy is an abuser.
Get rid of this idea that jealousy equals strong feelings for you, because jealousy is an incredibly negative emotion, why would you think it's a good thing for his feelings for you to be powered by negativity?
...............................
A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan +, writes (29 July 2012):
He doesn’t get jealous when other guys look at you because he trusts you. Why on earth would you want him to be jealous? Ask anyone who’s living with a jealous partner, or do a search for jealousy questions on this site, and you’ll find out that it’s very hard to live with some-one who panics every time you so much as talk to some-one of the opposite sex. It’s nothing to do with you being a virgin. I’m afraid that this question shows you clearly don’t have a mature understanding of what a relationship is yet, which you will develop in time.
I wish you all the very best.
...............................
A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (29 July 2012):
 No it is not because you are a virgin.
Instead you are blessed with an Honorable guy as your boyfriend is not a Control Freak who gets jealous at the drop of a hat.
Your lovely boyfriend is secure in who he is. He has confidence that he knows what he wants. He does not freak about about the actions of other guys.
He believes in you and has Great Trust in you.
He is not a Neanderthal with a cave man mentality who has to assert his dominance to feel ok as a man.
Be thrilled that you have such a lovely guy as your boyfriend.
Believe me Jealous guys are so irritating to have to out up with. They see a problem in every shadow. They doubt you and could start an argument in a bucket if they feel threatened.
Jealous guys are not proving the love you when they act up and demonstrate that the Jealously Genie is out of the bottle again.
What they are proving is that they are insecure. Not confident about their ability to keep your interest. And worried that everyone else around them is a threat to the CONTROL they want over you.
Please go give your lovely guy a hug and thank him for being such a nice guy and not subjecting you to the misery that so many girls suffer with a jealouse boyfriend.
...............................
A
female
reader, sammi star +, writes (29 July 2012):
 Jealousy is not a normal part of a relationship. The fact he doesn't get jealous just because someone looks at you shows that he trusts you and is mature enough not to fly off the handle about it. You should think yourself lucky!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2012): It is because he trusts you and has confidence in the fact that your relationship is strong and that no matter who may be looking at you, he knows he is the man you want to be with.
...............................
|
