A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:hello everyone. . Can you give me some advise please? My boyfriend of five years is very down and i want to help however it seems i am the onlY person that he gets nasty and up tight with. If i was down he wouldn give two hoots but yet its a massive drama with him. . . Everything i say gets twisted round, he is cold unaffectionate and it gets hard to keep in the relationship to be honest because i dont really feel wanted. . Every year since we have been together its been a trial tryin to get him to look at holidays. He proposed yet has never mentioned seriously. He says oh how about in a year. He wont have child with me altho we have from prev relationships and i just dont know if i should stay with him. He never says i love you and only time he is affectionate is when gettin back together after him ignorin me for a week . . I love him to bits but cant really talk to him as he always saves and throws what ever in my face when we argue which is often. But it will always be my fault. He is glued to phone always on silent. Never answers when i am there and he eyes up every woman that moves. What do you think? Why doesnt he end it with me?
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female
reader, Lucky786  +, writes (17 April 2011):
 "Why doesn't he end it with me?"....why don't you end it with him?
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (17 April 2011):
Being divorced before is all the more reason for you to end this before it goes further. The longer you hang around taking his abuse, the more you will miss out on the rest of your life. A relationship can't work if only one person is trying at it. He's not trying. As for him loving you, even if he does this is simply no way to treat the woman you love. You must not waste your life trying to make something work that can't. There are other guys out there, most of whom will treat you with more than your current boyfriend does.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni know what you mean, there has been periods of him ignoring me and i.ve said no when he got back in touch. He has promised me he will try to be more affectionate then goes back to normal. . He says he is just not like that, but he was otherwise i wouldn of fallen for him. . He can text it occasionally but not say to my face. . Also i.ve been divorced before and think perhaps i shud do what ever i can to make this work but even tho he proposed initially i dont think he has any intentions ? ! ! Do you even think he does love me?
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A
female
reader, Aunty Susie  +, writes (17 April 2011):
 What I'm thinking is, why don't you end it with him!!!!!! Why would you want to continue to live like that, you sound miserable. Don't waste any more of your life with someone who so obviously doesn't value you. Like really is too short. You deserve to be valued and to have happiness. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (17 April 2011):
Because you accept it. He can do whatever he wants to you, and you'll let him get away with it. And he'll continue to do it, unless you step up and end it with him.
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