A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My husband has always claimed that he doesn't/can't masturbate because he knows it's his own hand. (No, I don't seriously believe this) A couple of years ago, I found a pocket pussy hidden in his sock drawer. I asked him about it and he said he bought it and never used it (again, I don't believe this). Tonight, I attempted to have sex with him before we went to sleep, but he has to be at work super early in the morning, after working until almost midnight tonight, so he turned me down. Then I wake up at 3 am because the bed is shaking...it's him using his pocket pussy! This is the second time he's woke me up doing this after refusing to have sex. I'm not angry that he has a toy, I have plenty, but I am upset that he keeps lying to me about not using it and I would really like to understand why he would use it when I'm laying right beside him and he knows I wanted sex. Now he's relieved himself and I'm still sitting here frustrated. Is a toy better than the real thing? And knowing the toy doesn't bother me, why can't you just be honest about it, instead of pretending to be asleep when you realize I woke up, and attempting to hide it hoping I didn't realize what you were doing?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2016): Maybe he is embarrassed to admit to using the toy?
As for that incident, it does sound to me like he was too tired for sex but was horny. Maybe in the future on a similar night you could gently offer to give him a HJ or BJ (or even offer to use his toy on him) and then take care of yourself?
Good luck!
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (21 October 2016):
 My guess is he does not want to hurt your feelings. No I don't think his toy is better than you, I think it is because he wanted a quick release and that fitted the bill. Being intimate is a different story. He probably was being honest and told you he was tired. But he probably also needed a quick release and that is where the toy comes in. I guess he knows if you found out you would automatically think you where not good enough so he hides it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2016): Oh oh! That is not good.
Well, the most obvious answer is that he is addicted to that toy. That is what gives him the most pleasure. I am guessing even more than your vagina. It must be very tight.
The fact he did this in your own bed, after turning you down for sex is pathetic on his part. Thoughtless, selfish, oblivious, uncaring, self absorbed. I could go on.
Toys are meant to enhance, not replace. And I could see a pocket pussy being essential if a man was single and did not have a real live woman to have sex with.
He isn't solo. He is in a relationship. But he is not acting like it.
Sorry, but you are going to have to give him an ultimatum. The fake pussy or the real one.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (21 October 2016):
 Is a toy better.....? No; but probably it's simpler, quicker and easier than a sexual encounter. No demands, no worries aboit fulfilling the partner or waiting for her to climax. No foreplay or kisses or pillow talk. Just a quick, efficient, strictly physical relief. He was in the mood for, ahem, shooting a load, not for making love.
So , why could he not just come out and say it ? Well, it is a bit embarrassing. Even more if he thought you'd take it ... exactly the way you are taking it : " Whaaat? A plastic p...y is better than MY real flesh p...y ? " And even more since he has always been adamant about his ( fake ) persona of pure ,superior, non-masturbating male. He's got his little hang- ups, like we all have- and after what he said he'd feel a bit of an idiot admitting that he is just a normal , regular self pleasuring person .
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