A
female
age
30-35,
*abriela1993!
writes:My bf and I hangout out more now, bt the problem iss thatt he will only take me to his house, to have sex, and thats all. I know he is busy with school and stuff, bt come on,, only sex. Am i right or no??? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, hot raj  +, writes (29 December 2010):
in this stage nobody able to control his excitement you had better take precaution
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010): ok first of all...your a lil young to be doing that. and second of alllll next time he wants to say no. tell him you dont want to have sex
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (15 September 2010):
 He does it because you LET him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010): I'm afraid he's using you because he knows he can!! You're letting him have sex when ever he wants/feels like it.
Why don't you say no to him? Say I haven't come round here for sex, why don't we watch a film? See what his reaction is, THEN you'll find out if he's REALLY using you and worth staying with.
If he loved you, he'd want to do other things than just sex.
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A
female
reader, 0Guest0 +, writes (15 September 2010):
 sorry to say but he is just using you for sex.... Love and sex are NOT the same thing. Love is an emotion or a feeling. There is no one definition of love because the word "love" ...he is just using you for sex..
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010): Using sex as ' stress reliever ' I think not, as one reply suggested. What a wonderful excuse for all teenage boys to have sex as much as they can humanly get - suggesting a walk in the park, I don't think is going to work, as novel an idea as it is.
No he's using you for sex, as so many young boys of this age will and do, and unfortunately young females are way too quick to be sexually active with young boys before knowing IF they are actually in a relationship.
Sadly you now feel used, and this is not good for your self-esteem. As the others have said, STOP having sex with him, and see how he behaves, my guess, he will say it's not working out, or perhaps just vanish...IF he wanted a relationship with you he would DO other things with you apart from having sex at his house. How awful you must feel, so sorry you are being treated like this.
As a matter of interest how does this young man end your visit to his house after sex? Rhetorical question, as I suspect he gets his pants back on, says a few words to you and pretty well wants to get on with what he wants to do, minus you.
I would strongly advise you to try and move on from this young man, and IF by any small chance he really likes you and wants a relationship then he will do all he can to change and SHOW you he wants you as a girl friend and NOT a commodity for sex.
Next time you meet a young man you like, don't have sex with him just because he's HOT, or you think that's what happens, FIND OUT lots about the boy first, DATE lots, see what he's like after a few weeks, even 2-3 months, no better way to see if a guy is genuine and what their personality and character is like after the initial few dates. That is when people start being WHO they really are. SEX should only be part of a loving relationship, not an 'add on' because you're hanging out together.
If guys only want sex, they will soon move on when the girl holds out for more - but if genuine, they will stay around!
Get yourself a nice boyfriend as you deserve..
Jilly x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010): It doesn't sound good i'm afraid but maybe you should talk to him about it?
I did go through the same thing once, but turns out my boyfriend was having financial troubles and was saving every penny. So we just went to his and watched movies... and er had sex so to me it felt like I was being used a bit. But when I asked him he explained and now everything is a lot better.
So i'd ask you boyfriend first, but from what you said it sounds like he lives with his parents so I doubt he's in major debt. Just bring him up on it!
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A
female
reader, Elainey  +, writes (15 September 2010):
I don't think he is using you for only sex. I am sure he appreciates you as his girlfriend. Try to ask him out to accompany you sometimes and say what he says? Like ask him to accompany you to buy something test his sincerity again before you judge =)
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A
female
reader, Elydiese  +, writes (15 September 2010):
He's not your boyfriend whenever he wants sex he clicks his fingers and you run, he's using you, get rid of him and move on
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A
female
reader, xanthic +, writes (15 September 2010):
 He's using you, and unfortunately, you're allowing it to happen. Stop having sex with him, see how he reacts and make your judgment from there. If he suddenly decides it's not working out, it's because he was only interested in sex and nothing more.
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A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (15 September 2010):
Hi there. He's at the age where young men have a very high testosterone (hormones) level, and perhaps as a result, sex is on his mind a lot now.
Another reason for wanting sex more, is that sex is a good stress reliever. Perhaps he is wanting more sex because of the stress he feels about his school work and exams etc.
What would be an even better stress reliever for him, would be to go for long walk. It's great exercise, and it's very relaxing as well. He will feel much less stressed after a walk. He could walk for 30 minutes at a reasonable pace. It will do him a lot of good. He'll feel great afterwards. If he walks every day, for 30 minutes, and especially go for a walk whenever he feels stressed, he'll have a great way of being stress-free in future. Then you can actually enjoy your time together in other ways.
There's nothing wrong with having sex. But he's taking the fun and spontaneity out of it, because he's only using it to relieve his stress. It just makes you feel used, which in a way, you are.
So I suggest that you tell him that, that you don't like just having sex for the sake of sex. Tell him also, that it makes you feel used. It's also kind of degrading.
Suggest the walk to him instead.
Hope this helps you. Take care and best wishes.
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A
male
reader, Kenj +, writes (15 September 2010):
 He is using you, sorry to say that sex is not love and love is not sex.
In a relationship sex is only a small part, if he really loved you would know about it.
How long have you been together?
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