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female
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*wigs
writes: I am a 48 year woman that is involved with a 33 year man. We have been friends for a year and just began a sexual relationship when he moved an hour away. He send emails telling me he wants hot, loving sex, massages etc., but when we are together he does not appear to be interested. He never initiates sex, no kissing or touching on his part. As soon as I leave he sends messages about how good the sex was and how much he misses me, needs me, loves me. What is this all about?
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female
reader, chris's babygirl +, writes (19 October 2005):
well i have experince with this sorta thing...ya see my b.f "Chris" he does that all the time.....but he tells me he is just to shy to say it to my face.....(we have bin dateing for 3 years)....so if they ever say "they are shy" DUMP HIM he's either cheating or cheating
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2005): reading you answers a few of them are off, Iwill share the follow, Which is the frist answer seems to be more correct then an other. As a male I would rather respect the person I with and make sure 100% each touch, kiss or what have you is approved by my mate! Even in the early stages of a relationship which is most important. I my best option he is juts making sure he does the rigth thing and how better to allow you do make all the move, As yoyu guys get closer ad if he like me it might talk a minute but will be well worth it in the end...
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reader, wwww.datinghaven.com +, writes (25 September 2005):
I wish females will learn to break the stereotype that males should be the ones to make the first move, men should be the ones to ask a women out, men should be the ones to propose..etc!!!!!!
It may not be what it seems...
From your point of view its pathetic, but it sounds like he reli reli likes you but cant say it to your face, so electronic methods of communciations is an easier way to get his thoughts and feelings across!
I doubt he would waste money for a joke!
It maybe better to phone each other, there is no pressure face-2-face but unless he is scared of the telephone (dont laugh i am lol) then you might be able to talk open bout feelings etc. and you might believe him more.
I'm unsure what you mean, do you make the moves then have sex? Or is it just some wind up way of playing mind games and you dont have sex?
i know you hate him for being so laid back but if he isnt playing mind games he probably is respecting you or afraid to make a wrong move i.e. a kiss can be seen as a sexual assault, however, if a guy reports it he be laughed at, if a women reports it.. its taken serious: so more sexual activities like sex or foreplay which would be rape and sexual assault respectively.
If he strips you naked and has sex with you, you could either continue because u want it, get him to stop..which will be attempted rape (or rape if he enters or sexual assault) or you could wait til the end and then ring the police saying rape.
If you make the first move he probably feels more comfortable that you want it and has respect for you and your body. You should respect his gentleness.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2005): He's trying to play with your mind. He's playing mind games, whatever you do don't get back with him, you'll only end up even more confused and end up helpless, just like he wants you to be. It may not seem like it now, but he will do that, and you'll be thankful in a few years time, when you've taken my advice.
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reader, helpfull girl +, writes (24 September 2005):
you see some men like the woman to do all the work,maybe no body has ever shown interest in him b4 and because he knows you will if he doesnt show you interest he knows he can lye back un till you make the move, he enjoys attention obvously. to avoid giveing him attention when you go to his he goes to yours you should not touch him all hands off no matter how much you want to and your see he will be hands on to you! or you could just easily give him the good attention he's craved for so long! or it may just be the fact that he is to scared to show his feelings incase you leave him and if this is just a sexual ralationship then everyone knows for a fact that you will both end up going seperate ways! thats maybe what his scared of because he knows the same too.
why dont you try turning this into a proper ralationship if you both like each other enough too, tell him you want to turn this into a serious ralationship but on 1 condition the things he puts on his msg he's to say it to your face. if he doesnt want a ralationship then at least you sleeping with him ha ha.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2005): He sends them while your not their because if you were with him then it would be a total waste of his credit, he may also be embarrassed to say these things to your face. You could try saying to him the kind of things that he sends you in his texts to him in person and try to get him to open up more and express himself. Another explanation may be that he is trying to play it cool when you are with him and trying to make it seem like he is a bit of a tough guy who doesn't need sex. I hope this helps you with your problem.
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