A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I feel like in getting mixed signals from a guy friend. We hang out in the same crowd but mainly at the bar or a friends house when we are drinking. We ended up kissing at the bar a while ago and at the next get together he was ackward until he had a few drinks and then he was with me the rest of the night. The next day he played the friend card with me saying he doesn't want to ruin our friendship. Which I was upset about considering he only knows me drinking... At the next get together it was just ackward and he ignored me. Then I saw him again and we had been drinking but he finally talked to me and we discussed things. He brought up the friendship thing and I expressed how I felt about that. I never asked him to date me or anything before he had originally said it so I didn't know why he just said it. After we talked he wanted to kiss and cuddle again. It's confusing if he wants to be just friends but keeps making moves. I'm not sure what to think with him. I know him will enough to know he doesn't just kiss anyone but yet he doesn't want to know me more outside of the group when we aren't drinking.
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male
reader, Serpico +, writes (25 June 2012):
What he is telling you is that he doesnt want to date you regularly, but is more than willing to have drunken hook ups.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (25 June 2012):
 I am afraid that the anon female reader is correct. All his little speech about defending a friendship that does not even exist yet, it's simply a diplomatic way to say : don't get any ideas, you are not gf material and I would not dream of dating you.
Which does not mean, that he can't use a convenient, on-call drunken hook up for his nights out. If nothing better comes up first , of course.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2012): I agree with the other anon poster. He is just looking for drunken hook ups with you. Some people can be like that. Having sex with you does not mean anything emotional its just an itch you scratch for them. I would remove yourself from him the moment he starts trying it on with you. Dont be tempted to give in to his moves or feel flattered by his drunken attention. He is not being a true friend or lover, you are just scratching an itch for him and afterwards he tries to avoid you. Not very classy of him. I wouldnt think too deeply in to why he tries it on with you but not others. What he is doing is not flattering in any way x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2012): I would say he is saying this because he doesn't want a relationship with you, and doesn't see you being anything more than a drunken hook up. He still wants you to be his drunken hook up again though so he knows if he doesn't find someone else to hook up with he still has you as a back-up. I am sorry, I am not saying this to hurt your feelings, it's just how I see it.
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