A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Nearly ten years ago I had a teacher that I fell head over heels for. He was only 5 or so years older than me and single. I was a pretty obnoxious teenager and I made my feelings known to him, and he rebuffed me (rightly so). However, he'd also make strange comments about my male friends (how I would marry one of them but he'd never get married) and he seemed to flirt with me on occasion (getting closer physically than was really necessary, etc). When I finally graduated, I became roommates with one of my coworkers who also happened to be my teacher's former college roommate. My teacher came to a housewarming party where I poured my heart out to him and he turned me down flat. In the past year or so we've reconnected through Facebook (I initiated it) and now that I'm getting ready to move back to my old hometown, there was a part of me that hoped we'd reconnect. This may sound ridiculous, but today I posted something on Facebook that had a special meaning for us (i.e. movie/book/etc) and he "liked" my post, only to "unlike" it shortly thereafter. This thing that had a special meaning was very much about the troubled romance between two individuals (no, it's not Twilight!) and I guess I'm reading into his liking it and then taking it back. I'm starting to think that it's time to give up on the chance of us ever reconnecting or him ever seeing me as more than an obnoxious 17 year old. Is there a chance that he may have feelings for me? I just can't fathom that he's this put off by me. He's very homely and slightly overweight. He's relatively smart but incredibly pessimistic. I'm thin and am typically called beautiful by other people (people say I look like a mix between Emma Watson and Kristen Stewart). I can't fathom him being turned off by my looks, so it has to be my personality, which hurts the most. We've got so much in common. Mutual interests, similar values, same political values, etc. I've done really well for myself since high school, and I guess you could say I see myself as a catch. So why the heck is this guy giving me mixed signals? He's the only guy that's ever rejected me, which may be why this is bugging me so much.
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female
reader, Stayc63088 +, writes (19 August 2012):
 He probably still feels weird because he was your teacher once. And he probably has some dating or social issues since he is "homely". I think you have made it more than clear that you like him and he hasn't reciprocated those feelings so you should let it go. Anymore advances on him and you will seem desperate. It's probably that you aren't used to rejection and just can't understand it so it makes you like him more, in addition to still harboring old feelings from back in school.
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