A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Why do some nice people get exploited? I am a nice person and I've been walked on all my life. People take the piss out of me because they think i'm to stupid to notice and when i'm having a laugh and a joke, i always end the butt of it.I lived in a hostel and some of the people just turned on me and yet they liked me before, but it's as if they began to know what i was like, it was ok to exploit me. One women who talked to me when she first moved in, was interested in talking to me but it wasn't before long that she would make ridiculeing jokes about me being stupid. The women would talk about me behind my back aswell.I don't know what I'm doing wrong but i feel like their is something wrong with me for people to keep treating me this way. I didn't use to speak my mind buy now i feel like I've been forced to a little bit because i'm that unhappy and upset. I feel like I've got to let part of me go.I seem to be projecting to people that I'm stupid so i don't want to open up and be friendly anymore, because i carn't deal with it any more. I keep getting servaly depressed over these isuess and I'm currently on a waiting list to see a counciler. I just don't want to be laughed and joked at anymore. I use to be very friendly and open up quickly because i am genuinly interested in people but i carn't be that way now. That's the part of me that i have to let go because people see me as a nice person and i take it that, they see this as they see me as someone to be taken advantage off.I use to be the sort of person that would do anything for anyone. I even take sympathy on people i don't know, because i have a kind heart and i care about people. I carn't take anymore though. I haven't got anymore inside to give
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female
reader, Sweet-thing +, writes (15 May 2011):
 Even people who aren't nice get exploited, the difference is, the ones who are tougher don't give a sh** they just live their lives and say "f*** it to those who treat them poorly. Maybe you need to develop a bit of a bad girl side so people will leave you the h*** alone. Something to think about....
A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (15 May 2011):
 Please don't feel that you need to surrender being friendly. Being friendly makes people happy and it brightens their day and some of these people will take a nice person for granted. The world is cruel out of intent or ignorance towards someone who is friendly and emotionally vulnerable, you don't need to stop being friendly, just make it known that you will not accept their mockery. You are nice because you want to be, because you like seeing people happy, you are not stupid and you need to start speaking your mind, let it be known that you aren't there to be laughed at, you don't deserve it, not at all.
The world needs more people with a kind heart, who will show care for those who need it. Don't think that it is something you need to get rid of. There is nothing wrong with you.
I hope that helps.
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A
female
reader, chickpea2011  +, writes (15 May 2011):
 Dear friend,
Unfortunately you had some bad experiences in your life.. Its part of life, there are many bad, self-fish people, cold hearted, immature people, however there are many good, wonderful people out there.. You just haven't met the right people...
Please, I beg of you to not let this evil people to destroy the real you.. God made you a special, kind, generous person & please never change that... You cannot let these bad people control you...control your life...
There's absolutely nothing wrong with you, I know that after so many heart breaking friendships, its hard to regain trust, but never loose hope.. You are right about one thing though, some people see the kindness in you & they do take advantage, those people are no class, be happy that you are able to see the weakness in them in a earlier stage. You're a good, honest, kind person and God is helping you to stay away from the wrong people...
Never change your way, never loose faith, enjoy your life & don't waste another second thinking about these people and the past.. Just think as a life lesson and things happens for a reason..
Concentrate in the future, love yourself, respect yourself, believe in your gut feeling, continue being king and good people, real friends will come along your way... At the end, no matter how bad things seems if you good, you will be happy, you will find the right people!!! Like I said before, kindness sometimes attracts bad people, however most of the time, good people are meant to be with good people!...
Be strong! Believe in yourself!
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, fishdish +, writes (15 May 2011):
 I'm a lot like you in this way. It seems to me that the more people open people are, the more vulnerable they are to ridicule. Look at celebrities, everything they DO is public, and they are the most taunted, love-to-hate people out there. People only take advantage of people who let them. What is your typical RESPONSE to someone who decides to make you the butt of jokes? It sounds like they don't even know that you're hurt, and therefore that they've crossed the lines.
I've gotten the impression that most people are actually very uncomfortable with letting their personalities out off the bat, and try to test the waters for a while. Meanwhile, people like us try to get others to be comfortable by perhaps doing our 'true' personalities. Others, still uncomfortable and unready for that, put us down for us being ourselves. Also, I think enthusiasm is sometimes interpreted as desperation, and I suppose, in your situation, stupidity.
The main thing you need to do are to tell people that they've gone far enough. Don't worry about being put in the stick in the mud box, it will likely only show that you don't take crap from people when you don't deserve it. give people an inch and they'll take a mile.
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