A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 16 and have been dating this boy for almost two years now. He's 19 and he was my first, but I wasn't his. I was just wondering why everyone seems to consider sex at my age so horrible? I have never once regretted my decision. Of course the first time is always going to be a bit of an awkward fumble, but if you use birth control, and trust your partner... Then why is it so horrible to have sex at sixteen? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, HarryFlashman +, writes (20 February 2010):
Horrible is stretching it, but teenagers don't (statistically speaking, every individual case is different) make the greatest decisions. My guess is that the worry of most parents isn't that you will have sex, it is that you will get pregnant, get an STI, or suffer emotional trauma. All of those outcomes are more likely if you make bad decisions along the line.
Personally, I think it is better to wait, but if you can't, then at least try to make smart decisions about it.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2010): I think 13 is bad news. I don't think 16 is such a big deal.
But if you're 16 then you are not exactly old enough to evaluate and "look back on it" yet. See what you think about your choices today when you are 24.
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A
male
reader, Gabe121  +, writes (19 February 2010):
I think 16 is a pretty standard age to start having sex.
Biologically speaking a woman's body is designed to have children between the ages of 15-25 and back in the days when people only lived to 40 it was perfectly normal. However, with much longer lives, careers etc it has now become the norm to wait until mid twenties to mid thirties to have children. Which, in my opinion, is the sensible thing to do as you will be a much better parent.
Children born to teenage mums are far more likely to be fat, under educated, have low paying jobs and become parents themselves at a young age.
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A
female
reader, shamrockgrl +, writes (19 February 2010):
 I am 16 and I don't think it's horrible at all! It's just important to be responsible and smart about it (with respect to bd and stds). I was 16 when I had sex for the first time. We used a condom and had anal sex by choice. You are right, it was awkward and scary, and it did hurt some, but I never had any regrets. I felt soooo close to my bf with him inside me that it made up for any weirdness. You shouldn't regret it either....don't worry so much about what other people say. It's you that matters!
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A
female
reader, MissKin +, writes (19 February 2010):
 It depends what you mean by 'horrible'. If you mean horrible in the sense that people think it doesn't feel good or isn't pleasurable, it's because your body is still so young and having sex can be traumatic to your body and the complications that can occur because of sexual intercourse CAN occur and a sixteen year old may not be able to deal with it. It's also because a lot of people view sixteen as really really young, and sex isn't something children shouldn't be having and it is always considered more painful the younger you are.
But if you mean horrible in the sense that people believe you're too young to be having sex - it's because a LOT of sixteen year olds don't bother with protection or being safe, or sleep around without it meaning anything and teenagers have sex much sooner than when they reach sixteen, when you're all still children. It's not so much about physical age but emotional age and when you're a teenager, at 14, 15, 16, most people aren't grown up even slightly and they're doing something that some ADULTS aren't emotionally ready for. And it's like watching children grow up too fast and become adults before they have ever had a childhood.
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