A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hello dear cupid,a quick question - why do people resort to lying? why are some people complusive liars? And even when you know the truth and they know you know the truth, they still lie and try wriggle their way out of it, even if it makes them look stupid? Is a compulsive lair got a illness that makes them lie? I just dont get people who lie and think they can get away with it, especially when they make you out to be mental or/and possessive, turning it on you, making you feel guilty. How can people be so two faced and blatantly lie to your face and others. A control or insecurity thing?take this example: a guys phone goes off, you know its a phone call becuase how long it vibrates + you saw it ring, the guys out the room and you tell him his phone vibrated. He says its a text from them sales company's and shows u a text obviously from another day but doesnt show the time/date. why lie about it? even though its 1 of his mates? or he takes phone calls upstairs or outside? and he tells little white lies all the time? if a guy can lie about a little thing like that, what else can he lie about??
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female
reader, bordergirl  +, writes (28 July 2011):
I don't understand how people can look you in the eye and flat out lie. When confronted - still lie and deny - unless backed into a corner and presented with the truth in black and white - then they try to twist, turn, and manipulate the subject or shoot back a question to your question - how to you know - I did - who told you that - are you going to believe those other people or your husband. If you need to lie to cover up your deeds - perhaps you shouldn't be doing them at all!
A
female
reader, sammy1986 +, writes (1 July 2011):
people often lie because their lives are so dull they think nobody is interested in them so they lie to make themselves sound more interesting
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2011): Often they do it from fear and feelings of inadequacy, in relationships. They can lie for control, and sometimes they do it because they are simply pathological liars (which usually has it's origin in some type of trauma).Politicians lie because they don't know how to tell the truth.Dogs lie because they are tired, they are the only ones who have a good reason.
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A
male
reader, shawncaff +, writes (1 July 2011):
 What's more astounding to me is not that some people lie, but that they feel no guilt about it. As you say, they can lie to your face, and even when caught and cornered in the lie, still laugh it off or give a fake apology...and continue doing it!
My personal theory is that people generally lie in order to either evade responsibility or to dominate others. In lying, there is a certain creative power from which you can control other people. We create the world we want, and the person we want to be seen as.
Of course, the downside is that when we lie we really distance ourselves from others and lose touch with reality. Your friend may be lying so much he actually may come to believe what he says. A scary thing, indeed.
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (1 July 2011):
 Some lying is compulsive, and is an actual mental problem.
Most people just lie to get what they want, or to avoid getting something they don't want. That's really all there is to it. Naked self-interest is one of the most powerful motivators of human behavior.
The dirty secret is that a lot of people get away with lying - if not forever, than often enough that it's still a net gain for them. That's life, it's not fair, we just make the best of it. If people were more willing to heap social censure on liars, if there were serious consequences for lying, it would happen less -like any other social ills. But that's not likely to happen on any large scale.
For instance, if you caught your friend of several years telling one or more white lies to a third party, would you stop being friends with them? Or at least, express enough disapproval that your friend would understand your friendship was at risk? If not, and if they get away with it, there are no consequences. That kind of social censure is a lot more than most people do, or are willing to do, and I can't say I blame them.
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