A
female
age
41-50,
*owderedheart
writes:My ex and i broke up more than a year ago, and moved away from each other, we were together for a year and half, and it was a very passionate relationship, we definitely loved each other a lot, but i hurt his pride, and that was it for him. A few months ago we started talking again, and were making plans to meet up, which we did, and they were great, we spent a week together, and everything was like it used to be, we were super affectionate and it was great. Now it's been 3 weeks since i've heard from him... the last conversation was him asking me what my father had said about him after i told him we were hanging out again... he wasn't too happy about it. and we are not in different parts of the country again, and i've been emailing him etc, and i havent heard anything back... he is really bad with communicating, and it really hurts, but i just say, ok he's busy. But yesterday i saw that he added my cousin onto facebook and asked him "how are you doing"... and now i'm pissed off!!!! I dont understand how he has time to say hi to my cousin, but doesn't have any time to say hi to me. And i dont understand if he doesnt want me in his life, why he would be friends with my cousin (my male cousin really looks up to my ex)so i just sent him an email, saying basically, that i know he need a lot of space, and i'm trying to give it to him, but if he can't give me what i need, which is for him to say hi to me more often than a month at a time... then he cant give me what i need... and that if he doesnt want me in his life, he should let me know. his childhood friend told me once that he was like this, that he wouldnt hear from him months at a time. and i told him, that i could not handle that...i dont know what to do. his birthday is coming up soon, should i stand by no- contact until his birthday? what if i never hear from him again? but again, i dont know why i want to be with someone who has so little regard to my feelings....
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, powderedheart +, writes (5 October 2009):
powderedheart is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwhy do you think its about low self esteem?
i dont have any self esteem problems at all, actually i really love myself, but i think its because i hurt him once, he was definitely the one who loved me more before that in our relationship. it was perfect. and i do love him, so many things about him, all but his tendency to be M.I.A, which is just a part of him. moving on would be an option of i could just allow myself to get over him, but i keep thinking we have a shot.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (4 October 2009):
Leave this one alone. He's no good for you. The question is why have you gone for a guy who treats you like this. Is there something in your past that has given you such low self esteem?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2009): If the issue is that you want to be with someone who has little regard to your feelings, then you may have low self esteem. Best thing to do maybe to move on, and spare yourself the pain. Hope you make the best choice.
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