A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Why do I keep thinking about this guy all the time? I never used to be able to think of him as more than a friend until recently, what's going on? Also what confuses me is I know I like him, but then some days I wont like him as much as I did before. I do this with so many guys which is annoys me because I don't get why I can't just make my mind up..... Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2017): You might have NPD. They are prone to changing their mind from day to day like tat. One day the person seems to be their soulmate, the next day they want nothing to do with them. Not sure if your situation is that extreme but I actually came across this article because I'm researching my bf's Narcisstic behavior.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2011): Hi there, I asked that question and i'm really happy you answered it in detail because it makes more sense to me.The thing is we've been friends for over a year now, and i feel so comfortable around him and as though i can tell him pretty much anything. He does treat me really well and always compliments me subtly as he's quite shy. In regards to our interests and such they are so similar which makes our conversations so great and interesting! I know he likes me because he's told me, but you read all that and think why am i still not sure? But the thing is I change my mind so often with liking someone that i'm never really sure....
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A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (2 March 2011):
Hi there. Perhaps you are just not sure what it is that you want at the moment.Don't try to decide whether you like someone or not, or how much you like them. What's wrong with just being friends for the time being?Most relationships begin as friends. You first have to find out what things you both have in common with each other, interests, hobbies, likes and dislikes, music, movies, as well as important things like lifestyles. You also need to find out what type of person they are and how they treat you - hopefully, with dignity and respect always.My suggestion to you is, just be content with being friends for the moment with any young men you meet - including this particular one you have mentioned.In doing this, don't go into every male friendship, expecting it to turn into a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. This might be what you are doing. It's probably sabotaging all your friendships with guys.You have to stay completely open and without expectation. Take life as it comes.Perhaps you feel that girls can't have male friends. You can be friends with men without being partners. You can have female friends, and you can also have male friends.Just get to know any men you do meet, treating them with respect and kindness and talk to them and get to know them well. Do this as a manner of course.Eventually down the track, there will be some young man who you might want to get into an exclusive relationship with, which is more than friends. You can't rush it though. Just let things unfold by themselves. It can't be forced, it's a natural evolution.The friendship stage is a really important one. Because if you can't be friends first, you will never reach the "I Love You" stage and commitment etc. So believe me, friendship is a crucial stage - don't underestimate it's importance.So from now on - with this guy and with all guys you meet - don't pressure yourself into getting into the boyfriend/girlfriend thing too soon. Don't have that expectation at all. If you do, it will only succeed in making you very unhappy, unsure of yourself, anxious. It will ultimately just get in the way, and it will become a barrier to your happiness. It's not worth it.Just feel good about yourself, feel confident, knowing that you are worthy of the best life has to offer. And don't accept anything less - from anyone! Don't allow yourself to be taken for granted or mistreated, abused or disrespected. You deserve the best - always.Take care and best wishes.
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A
male
reader, KingY +, writes (1 March 2011):
It may be because he is different round other people I have had the same problem be4 and it turn out it was that so just watch how he his when he is a round different people
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