A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I love my current boyfriend very much and we have so much in common. We both want the same out of life and well we just have the same wants as in marriage, kids, house in a nice area, even same colour decor for the house and all that kinda things.My ex...that ended because he dumped me when he became depressed (it was a LDR, of 3 and a half years, and I found out 6 month later he got depressed because eventually saying goodbye to me for the 5th time proved to be the final straw and he couldnt do it anymore) I wanted him back and it wasnt over for me but he wasnt having any of it. Anyways I tried to get him back for a long time and nothing then I eventually gave up asking but would still talk to him online. When it came to marriage and kids my ex didnt want both of those and I do, so really deep down with that alone I should have known a long time ago that we wouldnt last because we didnt have the same wants in life when it came to quite alot of things but we just got along incredibly well. Well I moved on and love my boyfriend (been with him 8 months now)However this past week we have fought alot, he is a horrible person when hes drunk...he totally changes and I hate it. He often says things just because he knows it winds me up and Im insecure and says things which makes me worse and makes me paranoid.Anyways before I got with my current boyfriend I had applied for a visa to go to canada to live for a year which I can extend and it was accepted but I moved in with my bf and money went down alot and now my visa is expired and clearly I am still in the UK with my bf and all I've done the past few days is think how if I didnt know this one man (connections) my job wouldnt have changed and I wouldnt have been promoted a year ago and I wouldnt have met my current bf and Id have saved up plenty money and right now id be in canada and most definately back and living with my ex since he admitted a few month back when he was drunk that he wanted me back but because he had said no to me so much he was being stubborn and didnt wanna change and say yes then I moved on and he realised what an ass he was and was to late but that he thinks about me all the time and loves me and regrets all the times he hurt me and if he could he'd take it all back just to spend one more day with me.Whats wrong with me? Why is this all I can think about now? I cant go to canada anymore for starters and im in a relationship with someone else yet thats all I can think about.
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depressed, drunk, insecure, money, moved in, my ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, BondGirl72  +, writes (11 July 2012):
 I think sometimes we tend to obsess over things we have never resolved. We wonder what life would have been like with the other guy if things would have worked out. Or, it could be that you felt a stronger connection to the other guy and wish you could have stayed together. It could be that you regret some of the things you've said and done and wish you could go back and do things differently. Whatever the case, be careful with the drunk (current boyfriend?) because he does not exactly sound like Prince Charming.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2012): well for one, the current one sounds like he needs to be kicked out into the streets, he sounds like a deuce, ne way i think the reason your thinking about your ex is cause he said he wanted you back, that he would take you back, and your probably feel like you made a mistake, besides, a mean drunk might not be the best father, just my opinion, but if i where you, i'd dump that guy, go back to canada and be with your ex, he seems like a better guy in my opinion, hope this helps.
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