A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Please help me, as my heart is breaking! I love animals but I don't think I'm meant to have a pet for thte rest of my life. I have always loved pets, but right now I am not in a position where I would deliberately go out and adopt one because I don't have the stability in my life. However, I can't imagine a life without ever having a pet.I feel like I don't DESERVE a pet, and I can't accept it because a pet-less future just seems empty.I feel guilty because I adopted a stray kitten, and he somehow got loose and escaped, and I feel like I don't deserve a pet. I KNOW it's my fault, and my friend confirmed that, but WHY when I'm already feeling like crap?I'm 32 and I'm running out of time to find someone to share my life with and someday my parents will be gone and I won't have anyone to love me! Having a pet means everything to me. I don't have enough stability in my life now to responsibly adopt a pet. If a stray animal came into my life, and I had to choose between caring for it or throwing it out, I'd keep it, but I wouldn't go to a breeder and deliberately adopt something. Cats are OK, and I hd two cats that I loved, but I prefer dogs. People suggest a small dog, but I really don't LIKE small breeds! I don't know why... I just don't. I love Shepherds, Collies, Retrievers, etc. I realize that you have to understand the seriousness and commitment of adopting a pet, but I don't think I'll EVER be able to have one in the future, even if my life should become more stable, because I don't think I deserve any more animals. I feel overcome with guilt over what happened to the kitten and feel like I don't deserve that priviledge. I just keep thinking, oh man, I'm gonna be so lonely.I am living abroad now, but my dog, who belongs to my whole family, is back in the States and I long to cuddle her. She's a beautiful German Shepherd and I love her enough to give my life for her. I don't REGRET going abroad to live but I think about her all the time and when the sadness invades me, there's nothing I can do to make it go away. Am I crazy or horrible? Am I just not meant to have a pet? Does this mean cats hate me, or does my cat just have problems?My life feels empty without pets but I feel like I'm not MEANT to have one. I want to CRY and I can't... because I am gonna teach class in an hour. How can I accept that I'm not meant to have animals? Why was I given this love for them, and why do I keep ATTRACTING stray animals? They keep coming into my life, I have adopted a series of them... my Shepherd was a stray, and so was the Shepherd before that, and the two cats I had years ago. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2011): Thank you for your answers. I have always had a LOT of guilt, but I KNOW that I did what I thought was best.
A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (18 May 2011):
 I love animals myself, and I'm CRAZY about dogs, so I can completely relate to you. Why do you feel that you cant ever have a pet in your life? Agreed you're not in a position to be a pet parent now, but I'm sure you will be very soon. Please dont give up hope.
You know, I think your immense desire for having a pet translates into a much deeper need. Why are you so low on confidence OP? Why do you feel you cant find a partner who will be there for you? Why are you so negative? You're only 32...thats not too much. Really it isint. Having a pet is GREAT, but OP don't just always depend on the security of a pet. Think of the practical things. A dog's life span is anything between 10-15 years and you know what its like to get too attached to someone and lose them. You cant have the dog all your life, harsh as it sounds.
Please be more positive about life. You WILL have a pet some day because if there's anyone who's meant to be a pet parent, its you. But you must be objective and rational and not just project all your feelings and emotions on the pet. You will find someone amazing to spend your life with AND a pet as well.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2011): Ahhh, German Shepherds are the best, aren't they? When my dog died suddenly, I was devastated. What got me through my grief was volunteering at the local animal shelter. I thought at first that it would be so difficult (I'd want to adopt them all), but that turned out not to be the case. I went to the shelter every Sunday and walked the dogs for a couple of hours. It fulfilled my longing to have a dog, without actually having a dog. I hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2011): Well, in advance, thanks for your answers. I want to CRY but can't, and I absolutely feel horrible!
The mods wrote, ,''Why do I keep attracting stray animals?'' as the title. No offense to the mods, but my question is: I feel depressed because I don't feel like I'm MEANT to have a pet, and I want one so badly (at some point in the future, when my life is more stable)!!
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