A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, my girlfriend and i have been together for about 2 years (on and off).Im 16 and she's 15.its a little concern of mine which could turn into a majour concern. We've done stuff other than sex and its all gone fine but when it comes to intercourse, im not 'hard enough' to penetrate her (in missionary position)We've tried twice and both times its gone from hard to no so hard just as we are about to 'do it'she doesnt seem too keen on going on top for the first time either.im using the condom by the way.is this a common problem? or something to be concerned about?if so any suggestions?thanks, anonnymous.
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female
reader, leanne _a +, writes (6 October 2008):
 it happens to some people who try to perform its normal hun but the more you think about it the more it will happen ! just have a little play are even doggy and play with yourself to get hard then try gd luck xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioncheers for your responses.i dont think its nerves, atleast i dont feel them because im quite comfortable around her and stuff and its not as if i panic or anything.i was thinking of tryin a different position first so that once we've done it it should be easier the next couple of times...
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A
male
reader, IRDave +, writes (6 October 2008):
 Random handy tip, have her put the condom on! With a little practise she can put in on you with her hand or even her mouth.
I must say also, kudos for the condom
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A
female
reader, leanne _a +, writes (6 October 2008):
Hello both of you lie down next to each other and let her play with you and you play with her In no time you will be hard Dont worry about this your trying to hard to please and the more you think about this the more it will happen give it a go a bet you it works xx
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A
female
reader, penguin64 +, writes (6 October 2008):
 use some extra lubricant to get it in. and i find puttin on a condom ruins the mood cos its like hmmm yeah hold that thought while i do this. but i respect u for using them. why dont you get her to put it on then she can touch u at the same time. it might just be nerves that are affecting it if your not experienced and stuff. im sure once u get going you'l be fine. :)
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A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta +, writes (5 October 2008):
 Snafu :
"1) Do it in a quiet place where you won't be disturbed."
alot of people find that kinda thing kinky and a turn on.
"3) Don't drink alcohol beforehand. Do drink plenty of water."
Never head of drunken sex? 99% of the population drinks.. and chances are they get laid too.
"4) Quit masturbating for a while. Masturbation desensitizes your cock somewhat, so let it build up a bit."
YAY premature ejaculation!!
"5) And most importantly, WAIT UNTIL SHE IS SIXTEEN."
they're gonna do it anyway. least make sure they are using protection
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe've only tried it in the house, when noone else is in.
The thing is when in the missionary position it just seems like it wont go in, like its too awkward. whereas when shes on top it goes in easier.
and as to the last one, i think ill give it a miss :) I'd wait til she was 16 if thats what she wanted :)
Thanks for your response, much appreciated.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2008): We've only tried it in the house, when noone else is in.
The thing is when in the missionary position it just seems like it wont go in, like its too awkward. whereas when shes on top it goes in easier.
and as to the last one, i think ill give it a miss :) I'd wait til she was 16 if thats what she wanted :)
Thanks for your response, much appreciated.
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A
male
reader, Snafu +, writes (5 October 2008):
I disagree with the good Dr Vendetta. I don't think it is a mental thing, or at least the mental side is not as important as the physical factors. Indeed it does help to be in a safe and comfortable environment in order to maintain a good erection. 'Girl-on-top' is sometimes not the easiest position in which to remain erect - your circulation literally has to fight against gravity to keep it pumped, and you are not in control of your own stimulation. Condoms are a massive sensation killer for any man, and sometimes stimulation is needed to keep it up... but they are a necessary evil and much preferable than your girlfriend taking a pill that will mess with her hormones.
Here then are some handy hints for staying hard:
1) Do it in a quiet place where you won't be disturbed. Outside is not good, neither is sneaking into your girlfriend's house when her parents don't know you're there.
2) Keep in control of the situation. If you are in missionary then you can keep stimulating yourself right up until the moment when the condom goes on and you enter her.
3) Don't drink alcohol beforehand. Do drink plenty of water.
4) Quit masturbating for a while. Masturbation desensitizes your cock somewhat, so let it build up a bit.
5) And most importantly, WAIT UNTIL SHE IS SIXTEEN.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your reply.
A pregnant 15 year old girlfriend is the last thing i would like now, hence the reason for the protection.
The problem seems to arise when i put on the condom.
If she went on the pill do you think this would help?
also when she went on top before it was gong in but she said it would hurt too much that way.
thanks in advance.
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A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta +, writes (5 October 2008):
well first on.Congratulation. i'm not going to tear you a new virtual A$$hole. i'm shocked and plesently surprised a 16 yearold is using protection. so props to you for that.i'll assume you were a virgin before trying it out with the gf, have you been going through stress lately? family troubles? depression?lots of little thing could cause it. to start off with and to ease your concern. if you coulnd't get hard at all, then there would be a problem. right now its all a mental thing. something is affecting you to.. loose track of what you're ment to be doing. and you need to figure out what that is and address it.
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