A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Can somebody help me? I really don't know what's up with me. I feel so low and empty. I find myself wishing I could make everybody around me happy, to see them content - I know this is an impossible wish. Over the last 3 years my strong and bubbly personailty has broken down, I am someone who has never followed the crowd, but these days I feel that in order to 'fit in' I have to drink and go clubbing-it sounds crazy-but these 2 things dont really float my boat, but I feel like I have to go against my way of thinking so I won't feel left out by my friends. My friends are moving on so fast, I feel left behind.I am questioning all my relationships, friends, family and boyfriend. I find myself crying about things that are out of my hands. I am having really bad mood swings and I have loads of worries going around and around in my head. Most of all, I'm afraid that I will lose someone that I care for, by lose, I mean death. I know it's mad, but this fear of death came about 2 years ago when my uncle passed away. I am really missing my grandad and my uncle, and I'm grasping on to the people who are here, and as much as I should be living life, I can't, because I cant think positive, I've tried, but I can't! I am wearing this 'happy' mask in front of all my friends and family. Sometimes deep down I wish I wasn't here, can anybody please tell me why I feel like this? god bless x
View related questions:
clubbing Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): I am 23 and sometimes I feel bored with things and distant from people. I am surrounded by alot of people who care about me but the stress of things still gets me down. Keep your chin up though. Everything will be ok. My mother sent me this link to this site and it touched me. Whenever I feel down, I look at the site and I feel much better because I know that I am not alone. Hopefully this will help you also. Take care and the best of luck to you and yours. http://www.theinterviewwithgod.com/
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2008): I have been in a situation over the past few years that may or may not relate to your circumstances.I got married 14 years ago to a woman who I thought was all that I needed. She was 10 years younger than me, very beautiful and full of life. That is when it went all wrong.She started getting into debt and never told anyone (not even me). I only found this out when we decided to move abroad and I tried to sell the house. The bank told me I couldn't because the mortgage hadn't been paid for months and they were starting to repossess it. That got sorted and we moved but then it just went downhill.We came back to UK when my Mother took ill but unfortunately she passed away just a couple of months later. We stayed but then it all started again. More debt which stretched from 2005 but I only found out a couple of months ago. On top of that I had a heart attack in 2007 which was followed by me losing my job. The only work I have found since then is part time with low money. I thought that because she had a good job we would get by but then she decided that she was leaving on Boxing Day 2007.Like you I am trying to put on a brave face but I think most of my "friends" are now starting to see through it and they are moving onto other things. I have found myself drining more and more which is something I used to stay away from. On top of that the other weekend I woke up in hospital and have no idea how I got there. This is so scary. I have tried to get councelling which was recommended by my doctor but all I got was added to a waiting list.I am afraid I can't offer you a lot of help but please try to not get into the situation I have found myself.Take Care!
...............................
A
female
reader, elliebellie +, writes (13 February 2008):
hiive finally found someone who is just like me.i feel everyday is like a struggle for me. nothing makes me happy but i love making other people happy.i feel my friends really arent my friends. the only place i feel happy and content is in my room, curled up in my bed 'foetal' position. listening to music. i wear a happy mask the whole time at school and in front of my friends. its takes too much to wear it in front of my parents. im only 13 and i have no reasont o feel like this. a lot of people could argue that its hormonal an everything. up to a point i think.im glad i found someone like you. im sorry i cant give you any advice but instead share my feelings with you.feel free to mail me if you want to talkxxx
...............................
A
male
reader, Kawika  +, writes (13 February 2008):
 I'm not sure if it the same thing, but I once had an experience similar to yours. Does it feel like a black cloud just hovers over your head and nothing excites you anymore? Is your heart so heavy that the only comfort at times is to lie down in a fetal position? Have you resorted to alcohol just to suppress the pain? Does it feel like you are engrossed in hopelessness and despair. If such is the case, then I would agree with "Dazzerg"...it is symptoms of depression. I know its hard, but you need to re-evaluate your purpose in life. Maybe this is a crossroads in your life in which God is calling you. Maybe He wants to take you someplace where you couldn't possibly imagine. Sometimes He allows things to happen in our lives so He can bring us closer to Him. Unfortunately, it is usually pain that gets our attention. I know that if you follow your inspirations, you will look back 10 years from now and say...Wow, unbelievable. Not only will you be happier, but stronger. If you need something inspiring to read, read the Book of Job. It is a good place to start. I hope it helps you as it helped me.
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (13 February 2008):
 In your hour of despair , there is nobody who can help you except Jesus.Give your life to Him and your life will change for the better.We need His strength to make us whole again.
Sometimes , there are no right answers to every question or why things happened as they are.
You are going through a big storm in your life. Focus on Him, and those big waves will not look so threatening .
...............................
A
male
reader, Dazzerg +, writes (13 February 2008):
 Well without knowing your entire life story I would say the most obvious candidate for the cause of this slide is the grief of losing your relatives. You say that this started 3 years ago, was this when you lost your grandad?? From what you are saying here I am wondering if you had any deep-seated feelings that you didnt please either your grandad or your uncle (hence your striving to please everybody around you).
You are displaying symptoms of depression to be honest with you; the inability to think positive, the centreing of your thoughts around death and loss an inability to deal with things out of your control. Questioning established relationships is also a side effect of grieving purely because you lose an established relationship. You couldnt change the loss you have suffered and another aspect of this seems to me to be that you can't accept your relatives being taken from you and may even harbour feelings of guilt.
All I have written here is speculation; I think you need some form of counselling be it professional or from a trusted source to draw your emotions about your losses out into the open so that you can begin to deal with them and lift yourself out of this spiral. If things dont get better then you may need to seek medical advice. Good luck and take care :).
...............................
|
