A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:ok so i'm a really nice person, probly the nicest person in my whole skool, i'd do anything and everything in my power for the people i care about and i'm pretty much friends with everyone worth talking to.My problem is is that i get so close to guys and they'll let me b close to them and i'm an open book...but the guys always get so close and then we get to the point of liking eachother and then I get burned...why...what is happening with them? I am honest, tell them what i think, make them laugh, and still we get so close to a relationship and then i get burned...can anyone tell me why? I'm loving and passionate but after i get burned you lose all my love, friendship and trust and you have to start all ovr again...Why do i get burned? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (30 July 2010):
Every nice person in the world would like to know that! You're not the only one who gets hurt. The words 'nice person' are all too linked to the words 'got hurt again'.
You have to understand that it's not you. The problem with nice people is that we all look at the good points in people, casually ignoring the bad points in the hope that the person will either change or won't hurt us. So what you have to do is be more selective. You're talking to a lot of people, a lot of guys, and you're being nice to them all. That's very kind, of very trustworthy, but it does mean that you might well get burnt. So, as you get to know people, screen them and see how nice they are to you. Get rid of the ones who aren't.
Basically, you can be nice, but you need to screen crap people in your life out as you get to know them, and not give them a second chance.
A
female
reader, totty-flossy +, writes (30 July 2010):
 You may think your being really nice but to some people it can come across as forward and for most boys your age when a girl is forward it can freak them out.
Lads are about 4 years behind us girls when it comes to maturing and im sure most of them would admit that :) This means that when your being all nice and open and honest, they are thinking, "Hmmm shes fit, but shes too forward."
You sound loverly and shouldn't change your personality at all, but with the lad you like just try being a little less "nice" and play a little tiny bit more hard to get. You will probably find that they want you even more! :)
Hope this helps sweety :) xxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2010): I totally understand where you are coming from. You basically just described me. I’m the exact same way. With me my problem was. I was too open, and too willing to put myself out there when I wasn't getting it in return. I would suggest that you work on not being so nice or you will always get taken advantage of. Also, it’s weird but with guys it’s a game. You have to play hard to get. Guys like a chase and a challenge. If not they lose interest.
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