A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Why do all women immediately judge me by how overweight and ugly I am and give me disgusted looks? No matter where I go in public women look down upon me. The constant glares female strangers give me is really becoming bothersome. I try and smile and present myself in a friendly manner, but women still give me mortified, repulsed looks. And I have overheard women I have known personally berating me to their girlfriends and been told to me face by several women how disgusting I am. I have really only had two girlfriends in the past, and neither of them found me interesting or attractive and simply used me for their own financial/personal benefit, constantly cheating on me from the start of our relationships. I am going to give up on ever trying to find a woman who wants to be with me. Also, I want real answers, so please refrain from posting comments about it is all in my head, and how I am misreading women. This has been a constant issue since I was in high school. I thought things would change and get better as I aged, but that has not been the case.
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (6 February 2014):
 Why would you say you are overweight if you are not?
If *every* woman you have ever met in your *entire life gives you disgusted looks and glares then I think you are reading them wrong. Your social filter is out of kilter.
How do the men you meet treat you?
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (6 February 2014):
 From the way you posted on here, I imagined some 500 pound smelly grease-haired creepmonger who smelled like a cross between dirty feet, stale Fritos, and urine.
Even at your maximum weight and height before you lost weight, you wouldn't have gotten repulsive looks unless you're in the I Don't Shower For a Month club. Seriously, unless you don't brush your teeth and reek like a yak in mating season, you're totally fine!
I know a guy I used to work with who weighed like 350 pounds, was ugly as hell, and the guy was actually a player! I saw him go from dragging women all over the place with him to getting married and now is on his 6th kid. He totally looks like an old shoe, but he's got a fantastic magnetic personality. No, he was definitely not even close to rich. He drove an old beat up Dodge Dart when I knew him.
I think this has more to do with your personality and being touchy than your looks...that and your bitterness at your past relationships. Stop anticipating what you think women will think about you, and start improving yourself and working on a charismatic personality that people want to be around.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2014): Hi there!
I wasn't able to read your story earlier but when I did, you melt my heart so bad. Mean people really do exist in this world. Sometimes people can be really unfair.
My suggestion is this, you have the money right?
why not use your money for makeover? maybe there must be something wrong in your face that makes you look indifferent to people around you.
I hope you don't take it against me, and let's be mature about it. There are so many celebrities who under go surgery for anything unflattering on their faces.
Sometimes it could be the eyes, or the nose or something.
Fix it. that's one thing i could advise you.
Another thing is how you dress. maybe you need a stylist.
Also your hygiene. Make sure you brush your teeth and you take a bath daily. use a light cologne for men that will make you irresistible.
Weight is manageable. Consult a doctor and hire a physical trainer. We have advance technology, anything is possible these days. instead of exerting your energy to non sense people, use it wisely. hit the gym. eat a balance meal.
Most of all don't be grumpy. if their mean, just smile.
Leave everything to God. He knows your not doing anything wrong, he will protect you from those people who hurts you.
In addition, don't try hard to associate yourself with people who don't like you. You can't please everybody. Sometimes even the most beautiful person can still be hated just because they stand out.
Haters are everywhere.You need to help and protect yourself from them. Just be kind at all times and try to follow my advise. Maybe things will change for you. Use your money for yourself.
Good Luck!
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A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy  +, writes (5 February 2014):
 OP, sorry for suggesting you might be leery. I just couldn't think of any other reason why people would tell you that you're disgusting. It's a million miles away from what I'd ever say to anyone - unless I was referring to disgusting behaviour (leering, groping, and so on). I'm sorry people have called you disgusting based on your looks.
Well done on losing the weight. The rest is confidence, which I suppose/ hope will grow slowly as you get used to being slimmer and healthier. I can't believe you are so physically repulsive as you make out - remember, you've had girlfriends in the past. Plus, I see plenty of 'ugly' people who are happily settled down in relationships. Just look around at the people who you consider ugly or unattractive, and see how many are wearing wedding bands or are with their spouse.
Please believe me that confidence outweighs looks for many, many women, so there is light at end of the tunnel if you can work on that.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2014): Maybe you should speak to some kind of therapist to deal with your self image issues and low self esteem?
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (5 February 2014):
 OP congrats on losing all that weight... 170 at 5:10 is not even overweight... it's perfectly normal and acceptable. So there you go... it's not that women are rejecting you because you are overweight... because you ARE NOT. It takes a few years after losing a lot of weight to stop thinking of yourself as fat.
I am 5'2" I used to weigh nearly 300 pounds... I still had men hounding after me.
BUT I think I've figured out what your problem is. And it is YOU.
your post says
"would think that I come off as timid since I already know the reaction I am going to get from women. I still feel"
note you THINK that you know their reaction... and you come across as timid. LET ME TELL YOU THE MOST UNATTRACTIVE THING I KNOW OF IN A MALE. It's LACK of confidence. THE ONE thing that was MOST attractive to me about my husband (who I left another man for) is that he is confident and assertive and outspoken. A confident man is very sexy. My hubby is no prize... snaggle toothed. glasses... not tall... military short haircut... but damn that confidence had my attention.
then you say "I STILL FEEL" and go on to to explain that you basically feel fat and ugly and inferior. THIS is your problem OP. I know this. ONE of the things I hated about my ex husband was his self-hatred and his lack of self-esteem... it gets old and wearing and it's annoying. Folks can't know that you think you have reason to feel this way... they don't see you as your mind's eye sees yourself. Therapy can help this.
As for ugly.... well I would want to hear her exact words as I'm betting you have colored something she said with your own self-perceptions. Also how are your looks disturbing? Have you been burned in a fire? Are you missing an eye? Do you have a lazy eye (or are you massively cross-eyed?)...
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2014): This is the original poster of the question and thanks to all for the advice. To add on to part of my original post, I actually have lost roughly 80 pounds in the past two years. I was well over 250 at only 5'10", and I am currently 170, but still get the same looks from women. I am not "leery" as one of you suggested, and actually would think that I come off as timid since I already know the reaction I am going to get from women. I still feel as if society is treating me the same as I was when I was VERY overweight, and it still makes me FEEL fat. As for ugly, I understand I can't change that, but my looks are VERY disturbing to say the least. The berating in the past I overheard from women was in direct regard to how ugly I am.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2014): First off, don't ask for advice and then tell us what not to say. If you want the benefit of advice, you must have an open mind. If you already know the answers, you needn't ask for our help.
That being said. I do believe a great deal of your problem is in your head. Unless you look like the "Elephant Man;" it is unlikely that you disgust every female that you approach. If you are very sensitive and paranoid, you may feel like people are commenting and taking judgement on you. It has happened in reality, and it has hurt you deeply. So you presume everyone is doing it.
I'm going to be even more direct with you. Many men come to this site asking for help, and wondering why women find them so unattractive. Why they can't form meaningful relationships with women? Their biggest problem is they are terrified of women. So they create an excuse for why they can't approach them. Maybe deep-down inside, many aren't that attracted to women; and are suppressing another side of their sexual-orientation.
Take introspection, and write down your good-points and
bad-points. Fix the bad points.
Now be a man, and take some harsh advice. If you don't take care of your appearance; and if your hygiene is deplorable. Yes, people will be disgusted by the odor and what they see.
Disheveled appearance and body odor makes a poor public representation of an otherwise kind and sensitive human being. "Beauty And The Beast" is a child's bedtime story.
If you're a mess, clean yourself up. Weight is no excuse for poor upkeep.
Men who don't take care of their hygiene,dress sloppily, and are morbidly obese, may not get a lot of smiles. People are judgmental and sometimes cruel. That's the world that we live in. Not a single human-creature on this planet will not face the judgement of others. It's going to happen the minute you walk through the door and into the public. So you have to learn to expect it, and live with it. That's necessary for your survival. Becoming a hermit is your alternative.
There are people that will also disgust you, and your reaction will be just as human and hurtful. Your disgust would cause the same reaction. So forgive people for being human. You must drop this unwarranted and unfair prejudgement you're aiming at women. It's preposterous.
It will make you mean and touchy around them.
We rely very heavily on our sense of vision. Your image is the first thing we see. The brain will register a preliminary judgement based on the image that you project to others. Your body-language and attitude will add more confirmation to that first impression. We all have a fight or flight instinct; so we make this judgement-call,first on what we see.
You were totally defensive by telling us not to say it's all in your head. If you've heard that before, then take it into serious consideration. There may be some merit to that observation.
I take you are a kind and generous person. Willing to do anything to form a loving relationship. However; you are not eager to make any personal sacrifices for the sake of change, or self-improvement. That is evidenced by the fact you're still over-weight. If it's killing your game, do something about it. You can't force anyone to like or ignore it. You're too large to miss it. That's the breaks.
If you have a glandular problem that causes you obesity, that is understandable. That's a health-issue. Doctors still suggest that you get exercise and follow a dietary plan. If you ignore them, your body will respond accordingly. Therefore, people react to what they
see. Sorry the world is so cruel. You still have to live in it until you die.
So make the best of your life. Be thankful for life.
People are becoming more health-conscious. If you aren't taking care of yourself, expect others to take notice. There is a gene associated with obesity. Women are very picky about the man they choose who will give them
off-spring. They will most certainly eliminate the obvious
bad-genes. They want strong, good-looking, healthy, and intelligent children. So they chose mates accordingly.
I wonder how many very homely plane-Jane's you've ever approached? None, I suppose. Because like any other man, you will want to approach an attractive female. There is such thing as being "hypocritical." Judging and yet being offended by judgement. I don't believe one bit you approach "all women." Mostly those you find attractive. Fess up!!!
Regardless of how plane a woman may be, she still has a right to set a standard in appearance and personality of the men who approach her. She also has a right to show disgust, if someone is disgusting.
Four your health-sake, and if you don't suffer from a thyroid or glandular disease, lose some weight. If you have a full head of hair, get a modern hairstyle that compliments your rounder-face. If you have a beard, have it professionally trimmed and styled. Get properly fitting clothes. Use suspenders and not belts; if your belly hangs over your waste-band. It looks better. Sebastian Cabot, Orson Welles, and Raymond Burr were very large and attractive men. Barry White the R&B performer/composer is responsible for many babies born in the 70's to the 90's. a
No place is more unforgiving for size and appearance than Hollywood and pop-culture!
Those men all had style and class. They didn't allow their bulk to interfere with their sex appeal and very prosperous careers. They made it work for them.
They were serious actors/performers. Not fools and self-deprecating comedians like many big guys portray portly men to be these days. They don't realize how that influences public-opinion and attitude toward larger people. So I strongly empathize with you and how you must feel. You still have to live and be happy. You still must love who you are.
Your positive attitude and love for yourself comes first.
To you and anyone reading this, there is no getting around that.
If everyone hated the loveable big guys, we gay fellows call you bears; there wouldn't be all these couples I see out there. Go to the market or the mall. Tell me how you think those big fellows got those women? You claim women judge by weight and looks. Some love their big boys. There is noting like a bear-hug.
Your self-esteem molds your personality and directly affects the attitude. If you're projecting an image or appearance of self-doubt and self-loathing; then expect others around you to jump on the bandwagon. People don't just hate at first sight. Your encounter may be far too brief to form an opinion or a reaction at all. You can presume bad things in a split-second. If you're walking around with a chip on your shoulder 24/7.
Insecure people carry a vibe that people pickup on. Their facial expressions, the tone in their voices, and your temperament around people speaks in volumes. Even if they haven't said a word. People figure you out; because you're sending out a signal, far ahead of yourself. "I don't think I'm attractive, I hate being me, everyone is looking at me and hates me."
Then when you encounter someone, they may not even give a hoot. You presume they didn't smile; because they think you're unattractive. They had something else totally unrelated on their minds; but you figured it just had to be you. Why you might reach this conclusion about a complete stranger? I don't know; but we all do it. All of us.
"All" is a very inclusive word. You only know of the women you've approached. It could not possibly include all women.
Just those you particularly may have taken a fancy to. So you've awarded this generalization to the female gender.
You had a few bad experiences. Therefore, that will be the case from now on.
You know better than that!
Don't go the misogynist route. That's allowing cynicism to overrule your logic. You're being hypersensitive and it's human-nature to hate those who seem to hate us. It took a very sensitive person to take their time to tell us all that you have. You are hurting from the inside, and a number of insensitive women have been mean and hurt your ego. Trashed your self-esteem, or hurt your feelings.
Women are not that cruel. They dismiss a lot more physical imperfections than we men do. They do have limitations. We all do.
You change and improve what you can on the outside. You change your attitude and pursue self-improvement that increases your self-confidence, and boosts your self-esteem.
You learn to shrug-off insensitive and offensive remarks from strangers, and stand-up for yourself when it is appropriate. With dignity; you let people know when they are being blatantly offensive, and embarrassing you. You don't curl your tail between your legs, and run off like a dog hit with a stick.
Walk tall being who you are. Let people do whatever people do that have no manners or simple decency. We can't dictate to people how they have to behave; but we have to know how to navigate our way through the waters of life. We all have our place, and we are all entitled to love and happiness.
We teach others by setting a good example. Others take notice of this trait in you.
Lose the bad attitude. Join a nutritionist cooking-class
to learn how to prepare meals without empty calories and conducive to weight-loss. You'll also meet less judgmental females in the class. Many who have body-image issues or fighting weight-problems who will be more empathetic and friendly toward someone who understands how nasty our society is to those suffering weight problems.
I have to be tough sometimes to get a point across. I hope I've been helpful, and didn't hurt your feelings.
Good luck, my friend.
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A
male
reader, big rob905 +, writes (5 February 2014):
 First thing you have to do before any person can. Is to be able to deal with you .youhaveto love yourself before youcan love someone else .you have to be! able to get up and look at yourself in the mirrior and be ok withthat guy. And if your not ok with him do something about it . Im tired of peaple always putting blame somewhere else .you want to hear the truth. Women cheat on you cause you let them women dont cheat if they are happy in there realationship they cheat when unhappy.women dont want be with cry babies every person I dated cheated on me or did me wrong women want self confident men who believe in there selves who stand upfor themselves so my man if your so unhappy maybe its time get up off your ass and say ok . Im better than way ive been treated and start working out get some self confidence and self worth learn how to love I bet your next post youll fill different about yourself and them beautiful women
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2014): If you are genuinely overweight, why not do something about it? There really is no point in just feeling sorry for yourself because that's not going to improve the situation you're currently in.
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female
reader, peteloevely +, writes (5 February 2014):
 this comes from the mentality that people are going to like you as you are, whiles i do believe you deserve dignity and respect, we all gets looks and people looking down on us,if not because you overweight it is because your are attractive either way people will talk.the fact is we all sacrifice to get what we want and if been over weight is not working for you then maybe it is time to sacrifice and make a change.i my self have been dealing with a severely under working thyroid whiles it remained untreated i gained 3 stones. was it hard to date whiles been severely over weight? yes, but why? well for a starts been over weight limits your choice of clothing and activities which makes you instantly uncomfortable, which translates in to insecurity when around people, because in regardless of how much you have personally dealt with your weight issue, there are eminent external factors that make the situation worse. so the issue isn't always about having a great soul or that beauty is subjective or on the inside.there are key components that come in to play when humans are interacting with each other. from behaviour to appearance, those things send signals out transmitting to the world what your living habits, dietary style, interests etc are.been overweight unfortunately whether truthful or not sends the message that you are sedentary, not active, unhealthy, short life span, low stamina and the list goes on, other factors that could be contributing to your problem is the fact that human fat contains oestrogens which is a female hormones, making your skin softer, reducing your body hair, giving you feminized facial features etc... all the things to repel women.
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A
male
reader, SensitiveBloke +, writes (5 February 2014):
 In my year at school, the boy who'd been out with the most girls was one of the ugliest in the year. But he was probably the most confident and outgoing, and this is what girls found attractive.
Looks play their part, but more important is whether you have a good personality. Are you friendly, chatty and make people laugh? Are you happy with life? Are you enthusiastic about life? These are what's really important.
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female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (5 February 2014):
I don't think you are misreading people and I don't think it's all in your head; you can't be imagining women telling you are disgusting to your face, after all.
Are you approaching women in a certain way that could be interpreted as something other than friendly? I mean, is it possible that you are being a bit unintentionally leery? I don't mean that to sound as unkind as it probably does, but I am finding it hard to believe that ALL women act this way towards any man just because of his appearance.
I would never give an overweight or ugly man a disgusted look (why would I, if we're both minding our own business? or if he simply smiled at me in a friendly way?). But I have given disgusted looks to leery men; men who I perceive to be creepy or crossing the line with an unwanted advance.
Perhaps there is something in the way that you are approaching women that they find uncomfortable? Can you ask your female associates - the ones who you overheard berating you? When a women has called you disgusting to your face, have you ever asked what they mean by that? What prompted them to say it? Or perhaps you could think about what you may have said or done in those instances. You have a chance to learn and modify your behaviour....if that's the problem.
That aside, you are young, you can change your appearance somewhat if you chose to. You can choose to try and lose weight and improve your appearance if you think it's all based on your looks. Unlike SVC, I have never really gone for heavy men, but ugly men don't put me off if they are nice on the inside.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2014): Why do you care? I mean if weight is an issue for you then lose it. Simple as that. You don't want to be pandered to and told it's all in your head? Then deal with it like a man instead of moping about something that you can easily change.
I used to be very fat, I was the time balding too and I don't think anyone could describe me as handsome except for my wife, I don't know where you get this crap about people talking about you. I've had some looks, some comments but you honestly speak like my paranoid schizophrenic uncle and that everyone is judging you and staring at you.
Did you ever think they could be commenting on the fat, unhappy looking guy who keeps staring at them with bitterness in his eyes? That maybe they're commenting on why this creepy looking weirdo is looking around for people who just might be talking about him?
The difference between me and you is that when I was fat and bald, I was jolly, I was approachable and bullet proof. I wasn't bitter about life, I wasn't seeing a reflection of my own insecurities in other people like you are.
You're a lonely, bitter man looking for trouble and you're finding it, if it's not all in your head then how come my experience of life as a fat ugly person was actually quite positive fulfilling?
You thought things would change and get better but refuse to believe that this is all in your head? Well there you go then, OP. The only solution to your "problem" is the one you refuse to believe, you've let bitterness consume you and you blame everyone else for that too.
There is no such thing as ugly, life isn't a popularity contest. I never needed to be desired or wanted by most women, just the ones I chose and in the most part I was successful at that because I'm confident, happy, I like myself, I have joy to bring to a relationship, I'm intelligent, I'm exciting and being fat and bald had nothing to with any of that. Weird huh? Weird that simply my attitude to life and how I dealt with my appearance by realising it had no tangible effect on my life made my life pretty damn sweet. So tell me again how it's not all in your head, OP. Because it was all in my head and I dealt with it just fine. How are you different to me?
So now you want to give up on yourself, throw in the towel and just call it quits. For what? Because you can't get over the fact you were cheated on? Because you feel other people should just be nicer to you, not comment, not notice you? It's how you deal with the world that affects how others treat you. You say you're civil but I bet your bitterness and self-contempt makes you cold and stinks up the room with negativity.
Find something else to focus your life on. Start working out. Take up some exciting hobbies. Start education yourself on topics that interest you. start filling your life with beautiful things and great experiences and learn to let go of your crushing self-hatred and you know what? You may not think it's in your head but it is, and you should go seek some professional advice on the matter.
Your choice is simple, OP. Give up, or fight on and do whatever it takes to give yourself the bets life possible. Live life as a bitter drone or go be happy and exciting. Stop focussing on women and start focussing on white water rafting, fixing up an old car, train in MMA, start writing a memoir, learn a new language, pack a bag and take a few months off work and just travel anywhere and everywhere. Start living.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (5 February 2014):
 This is going to sound a little harsh and I apologise in advance, but you have asked for real answers so a real answer is what you are going to get.
You say you are overweight - how much overweight are we talking? Unfortunately if you are severely overweight, morbidly obese sort of category then regardless of what sex you are, people will comment and look at you. Morbidly obese women will get the same looks and comments that you get, just from men instead.
This is simply a fact of life, as humans we are not supposed to be morbidly obese therefore it is not a typical shape for a human body to be. When people are different shapes to what we are used to, people stare and make comments. The more you go to the extremes, i.e. the more overweight you become, the more unusual you are, and the more you are going to attract unwanted attention due to your size.
Ugliness is a variable concept so that is probably not why you are getting looks (unless you have some sort of physical deformity, I dont personally believe deformities are 'ugly' but shallow superficial people probably would). To some people Angelina Jolie is beautiful, to others she is unattractive being so thin with a big head and big lips. So beauty really is in the eye of the beholder, hence the same rule applies to 'ugliness' - one person's ugly is another person's beautiful.
The likelihood is the weight is your biggest issue, and if you lost the weight you wouldnt get so many negative looks and comments. The people you have encountered are particularly nasty, I know I'd never walk up to a person even if they were morbidly obese and insult them to their face, I think that is incredibly unkind and shows what an awful person they are if they can hurt other human beings like that.
What is holding you back from losing weight? Is there a medical reason for you being overweight? Is this something that you can try and change? I know it is easier said than done, I struggle with my weight too and need to lose about 40lbs (I know it isnt that much but I find it hard).
Human beings are judgmental, that is the way we are born. Some are more judgmental than others, but as a whole people that dont know you as a person only have your looks to go on - and someone that is very overweight is often judged as lazy, unkempt, lethargic and lacking in motivation. Is that what women look for in a partner? No, they want the exact opposite.
So as harsh as this sounds, if you want the nasty looks and comments to stop, take matters into your own hands and lose weight. Being overweight is not good for your health, it is not going to make you happy and it is only going to lead to problems. So lose the weight, the looks and comments stop, you will find is easier to find a partner and your health improves. Seek help from your doctor if you struggle with willpower, there are so many options available now to lose weight and you dont have to do it alone.
You are in control of your own destiny, this is your life and you need to get a grip. Yes there are nasty people in the world, and I'm not saying what they do to you is ok - but you cannot wallow in self pity claiming everyone on earth is mean therefore you can hide away. The only person that can change your life is YOU, you have the power to make these comments stop - so you either do something about it or you stop moaning about people being nasty to you.
Your weight is your choice, therefore in a way you are bringing these comments on yourself. I know we should all be more grown up and not make nasty comments about other people, but the fact of life is you cannot change human nature and nasty people will always exist.
I hope you dont find this offensive, I certainly dont want to stick up for the women that are horrible to you - they are not nice people and it is a shame you encounter people like this in your daily life. But you have to take some responsibility for your health and your looks, and if you are unhappy with the attention you receive due to your weight then you have to do something to change that.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2014): If you are morbidly obese than of course, women will look at you like that. How else would they look at you if you have no respect for your body and eating yourself to death?
For me extra weight talks about person' s personal traits. For me it means that this person has no self discipline and yes, this person will be repulsive to me and I would never want to have sex with this person be ause of his looks.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (5 February 2014):
How overweight are you? 20 pounds or 200 pounds. or somewhere in between. pants size would help me know too.
as for ugly... is your skin bad? your teeth? nose too big? balding? what makes you ugly?
see right now all I have are subjective things to deal with (what you say women say)
and since I tend to go for big thick guys (not muscular I like a guy with love handles) I need more info before I start with it's something YOU are doing that's causing this.
How did a woman berate you to her friend... I think that you misinterpret the word. Berating some is to scold or criticize a person angrily. that means she would be doing it to you. rather I think you overheard two women saying things about you... what did you hear exactly?
In my experience women will only tell men to their face they are disgusting when they have DONE something that is disgusting. NOT just based on their looks.... what are you leaving out?
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (5 February 2014):
Well, the first obvious question is - are you overweight and ugly?? If the answer is yes, then my second question is - why are you concentrating on what you don't have??
I won't waste space on here talking about how you being overweight is very fixable, because you already know that. Losing weight is the best gift you could possibly give to yourself. BUT...in the meantime,
While you're losing weight, you need to look at the hand in life you were dealt. So you don't have the looks or genetics or athletic acumen that makes things so much more easier for the beautiful. So you go with your strengths. Stop looking for the repulsed look and build what you're good at. Your brain, your financial prowess, your ambition, your fill in the blank.
Overhearing women berate you? What context was this in? You had two girlfriends in the past, so you have the ability to attract. You also had the ability to recognize being used. Beautiful people have dealt with this as well, so what makes you different?
Don't be negative. Concentrate on the good things in life...resist bitterness, and your life will be better. Start looking for repulsed looks, and you'll find them around every single corner because you're repulsed with yourself. Find something to LIKE in yourself instead.
And if you're overweight??? HELLO!? Yes, some people have a bigger problem being genetically disposed to weight gain, but living healthy and exercising is so utterly transformative. Don't reach for the chips! Reach for your coat to go take a walk. Don't let life pass you by anymore.
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