A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi. Just wondering if anyone has any idea why he didn't ask for my number. In a quite busy night life area, I was with a friend and gave this very cute guy signals of interest. He came over and we chatted for about 10 minutes.As I enjoyed both his looks and personality, I offered him my hand to shake. He accepted it and-with my full cooperation-he pulled me into him and we hugged and kissed for a while. Then he said he really enjoyed talking to me but had to go, and hopefully meet again. And went...out of my life.Any idea why he didn't take it further like asking for my number? Don't get me wrong, I really enjoyed my 20 minutes with him and would anytime do it with him again even if he keeps it short. Although of course it is far from what I want, which is some continuation. In fact my friend said she felt jealousy of my time with him.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2013): I seem to recall a few months ago, a guy posted asking about having a chat with a random girl and kissing without actually picking her up. The female responders-some of whom are responding here-told him it's not moral and shouldn't be done if not planning to ask out. If it's between a hot guy not approaching me at all or having just a talk and a kiss and cuddle, I would take the latter any day and so would most of my friends
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (24 July 2013):
 Uhm.. because he could not be arsed bringing it any further ?...
I don't see why you consider what happened so exceptional. The guy is out for a low pressure night of fun and frolic, not necessarily for finding a gf, or even a steamy fling. He puts his feelers out, whatever happens is good, - he gets a nice 20 minutes of kissing, which helps killing time and making the night more lively, then he goes on his merry way,toward more drinks and different girls. I bet all you want he hasn't put much conscious effort and attention in the selection of a girl out of those who were vying for his attentions. In other words, you were fine- but if it had not been you, the next one would have been fine too. The way the thing played out does not necessarily indicate that he wanted more than his 30 minutes of girl sampling. Au contraire.
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A
female
reader, Got Issues +, writes (24 July 2013):
 I wouldn't say I'm the ballsiest girl around but I have asked guys for their numbers and in fact most of my female friends have. I don't think there it's anything exceptional about that.
I also don't think there is anything unusual about a guy just wanting a bit of a flirt on a night out. Not every guy is looking to sleep with every girl he meets.
You say that all the girls were vying for his attention and he sounds confident. It's unlikely that he is single. If you see him again, talk to him by all means but don't expect too much.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2013): OP here. Honeypie, if I would have waited for his number, there would have probably not been any hugging and kissing.... and I really enjoyed the snog :-)
Re giving him my number or asking him for his, it's very rare for a female to have the balls(lol) to do that and I am no different.
It's also very rare for a guy to choose a girl out of most of the girls around(who were also vying for him)and then not take it further. That's the reason I was asking. Married or have girlfriend? Maybe
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A
female
reader, shrodingerscat  +, writes (24 July 2013):
 You could easily turn this around and say, why didn't YOU give him YOUR number.
Or-
Why didn't YOU ask?
You're just as much to blame for your disconnection as he is.
Next time you meet a guy that you like, be more forward. If you can't, don't wonder why you're still single.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (24 July 2013):
 Maybe he liked kissing you but nothing more.If he is interested he will seek you out. If not, well maybe next time don't snog a guy til you at least knows his name & number....
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (23 July 2013):
 Heh, the other theory is that there's someone else who would answer that number, meaning a wife or a girlfriend. Cuddling and kissing a woman in a bar for 10 minutes is an ego boost for you and for him, but he wasn't interested in anything but that.
9 times out of 10, guys who don't hand out at least *a* number are those looking to sneak behind the back of someone they're committed to. The other 1 is homeless. heh.
If he frequents that place you were at, best to ask him for his number to see what happens, and at least his name. In this information age, finding out about someone is effortless if you have the right information.
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A
female
reader, Got Issues +, writes (23 July 2013):
He probably did the same thing with 19 other girls that same evening. That would have been a lot of names and phone numbers to keep track of. I think you need to put this down to a bit of a flirt and a kiss with a player and try to forget about him. I'm sure it does happen but you are unlikely to meet the love of your life in a night club or what have you.
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