A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi, a confused, hurt and wet-in-tears girl here..I broke up with Mr.C 2 years ago, I dumped him cos' I decided to move to another state and work there..and fall in love with a guy..I THOUGHT i don't have any feelings for Mr. C anymore, so I go on with the new guy and leave him with his pain. He suffered, i know, he called hundreds of time..but i never care to listen. I finally broke up with the new guy becos I realised that i still love Mr. C and almost 6 months I cried everynight cos I missed Mr. C so much. He never blamed me for ending our relationship, never get angry no matter how much i hurt him.. Instead, during these times, he called me every night to calmed me down, gave me comfort by saying 'it's ok, don't cry'..But we didn't get back together..and again, I start a new relationship with Mr. D. He's almost exactly like Mr.C's personality..that's why i really love him.. But when i went to my hometown and met Mr. C, again..my feelings for him grew deeper until it hurts. I feel guilty with Mr. D for not loving him truely.. He really loves me..So the problem that's confusing me is; I've dated 2 guys after I broke up with Mr. C but it seems that i never forget him..I still keep his pictures, listen to his fav songs and always sms him.. He seemed to feel the same way as i am. he said he still have the same feelings for me eventhough he'd dated with a girl after our break-up.. When we're alone together i cried so hard as i missed him like crazy. I can't bear the pain anymmore, i miss him, i need him..but I can't leave Mr. D! After all, we're in different states becos' of work. I only meet him like, 2-3 times a year.. What do I do?? Why can't we forget each other eventhough we have someone else in our life?
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male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (24 January 2008):
I was put in da same situation with Mr.D by my ex and i can say that it was the most painful months of my life.Don't go out with someone out of loyalty.It's better you break up with Mr.D but stay single for a while bcoz Mr.D will feel betrayed and you JUST need time alone.I wish some of you ladies would be stronger and not make decisions based on your feeling but on something bigger!Good Luck.
A
female
reader, Lily Moll  +, writes (24 January 2008):
You should do what is going to make you happy. It's very kind of you to consider Mr. D's feelings, and no doubt, you care about him very much and don't want to hurt him, but you said yourself that you don't love him like you love Mr. C. You also said that the reason you love him is because his personality is so much like Mr. C. Now if you have the opportunity to be with the one you really love, and he wants to be with you, why settle? It sounds like you feel guilty, but guilt isn't the best motivating factor. You don't want to hurt D, and you're not purposely trying to hurt him. Now ask yourself: If you were single, and Mr. D were not in the equation, would you move just to be with Mr. C, or is there something else keeping you where you are? The best of luck to you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks a lot there..:-)
that's actually a very good solution, but apparently I can't do both..
maybe being single would do..another but is I don't have the heart to break up with Mr. D..
Anyway, thanks again cos your answer made me think that I should stay single a bit longer nxt time..
Take care.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2008): Hey heres a thought. Move back to C. Or C move to you.
Remember too you don't have to have a relationship all the time. Try living alone for a while, Going off and finding a new squeeze ain't always the answer.
Good Luck
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