A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: hiWhy am i SO against men and how they are with women?i hate the fact that all teenage boys and men only care about sex? i just feel that women are used and it truly offends me!i have never had sexual intercourse with anyone before, im only 16.how can i get over this anger about it? it makes me depressed just to think that men are like this.
View related questions:
depressed Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2007): Yes,
You are probably in the most intense/difficult time sexually than any other time in your life. I suppose Darwinian theory is to blame for young men to only think about sex.
Find someone, as Jabey writes, that respects your wishes and your speed for proceeding with intimacy, but realize you cannot have a life-long relationship with a young man who are "hard wired" to think and have sex constantly.
All the young, single mothers can atest to that fact.
There are so many single mothers because they thought they chose a man that was attentive to them and thought like them. The emotional growth of a young man remains "stunted" because the only motivation that exists for them is "what do I need to do to get laid again?"
I am 45 years old. At my age, you will see many of "God's Jokes". One of them is seeing how the male and female drives or dispositions switches from your age to mine. When you get to my age, you will reminisce about how good you had it at your age now!
Anyway, keep asking questions like you have -- your understand of young men should change from anger to empathy -- it's just not their fault.
Have fun, and please wear protection!
A
male
reader, Dakotanative +, writes (22 February 2007):
It is a fact of life. Men like sex and women like stuff. If a guy buys a woman flowers, he probably wants a reward (sex). If a woman gives a man a night of sex, she wants a reward (flowers). Who is being used?
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2007): Well, you may want to find someone like me i guess. I am 25 yr old single guy, am virgin, and i think there is too much pressure exerted on guys by society when it comes to sex. Atleast i do feel it and don't like it at all. How many times have i seen women initiate something sexual towards me and i get annoyed sometimes. Now, some guys would find this appealing and would call me gay or something for being indifferent to these things. So i have to wear a mast at times to pretend to be a so called "MAN" in the eyes of other people.
Having said that, i do like some women and even feel aroused by a particular kind of shape in their structure. But it is never all about sex for me when thinking about them and honestly, i don't think about them a lot ;-)
...............................
A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (20 February 2007):
You're right that some men, and probably most boys at your age are all about the sex but they do change as they get older. Sex is always important in any relationship but they learn to value different things. I'm betting that your point of view comes from watching friends being treated badly by guys and possibly an adult in your life too? Things do get better. Men do mature, they just do it a lot slower than us women. Bear with them and be careful who you have sex with in the meantime. Make sure you're sure and, being aware of the chop and changing of guys your age, always use condoms if you do decide to have sex.
CD
...............................
A
female
reader, jabey +, writes (20 February 2007):
I agree a lot of men do have sex on the brain, especially in their teenage years. Its not actually there fault it is their hormones and how their bodies will work.
I congratulate you though on having the sense to be saving yourself.
But also there are thousands of lovely men out there, and the sex thing in a way can be a great tool for us women to decipher the good from the bad. If you meet someone you like, relax and give them a chance, if you wish to date them then do. Now a good genuine guy will date you, respect you and not push you for sex until you are ready, and instantly you will know you have met a decent man. Whereas if you meet a man who pushes you, persuades you, gets annoyed if you say no, then bingo you know he is a bad egg, not geniune and not worth it.
So rather than get angry enjoy having the power to find out the good from the bad.
In my experienc and Im 36, when I have met guys in the past the ones who seemed desperate to get me into bed I blatantly refused, admittedly this made them keener or |I soon never heard from them. But the ones who wanted to know me were happy to wait, and Im still with one of those lovely men now. And Im also glad he does like sex !!
Try not to be angry, if you chill a little you might find you enjoy getting to know some lovely men, and enjoy their company which will releave some of your anger. And those women who will just sleep with men easily thats their choice, and let them be, but sadly they will often find the men they sleep with quickly dont often stick around to find out what lovely girls they are. Whereas you will meet a man who does get to know you.
Take care darling.
...............................
|